#winter skydiving | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

runariya · 3 months ago

Text

Crash Course in Love • 1

pairing: snowboard instructor!Jungkook x ex-gf!reader (feat. platonic OT6) genre: rom-com, Exes 2 Lovers, slow-burn, angst rating: 18+, MDNI warnings: strong language, slow burn, angst, Namjoon's a snack, smoking, brief mentions of drugs, OC and JK are petty af, lmk if I forgot smth word count: 15.2k

a/n: Part 1 is finally here 🎉 This fic is going to be my comfort story. It's relaxed for me but also quite new in the way I'm telling it and the length. I hope you like it and enjoy it as much as I do writing it 💕

a/n 2: This work is purely fictional. All characters and events are entirely imaginary and do not reflect reality. No translations are allowed without permission. Thank you for understanding! 💕

masterlist • 02

You’ve never been much of a risk taker. That’s just not who you are. You've always believed in playing it safe, thinking it’s better to be cautious than to end up regretting a choice. But living that way has meant you’ve missed out on the grand adventures that others your age fondly reminisce about. In fact, this cautious attitude is exactly what ended your last relationship.

Jungkook, your ex, was the definition of a thrill-seeker, the kind of adventurer you read about in stories. He thrived on excitement, and in the beginning, he managed to pull you into his world, convincing you to join him on his smaller adventures. You’d go camping with him or ride along on his motorcycle. It wasn’t much, but for you, it felt like a lot. You were doing things you’d never willingly do on your own. For him, though, it wasn’t enough. And you knew that. So, rather than holding him back any more than you already had with your shy, introverted, no-risks-please kind of persona, you ended things.

Did you regret it? Both yes and no. Yes, because letting go of the love of your life hurt more than anything. And no, because you knew it meant Jungkook could finally live the way he always wanted, without restraint. Watching him happy, embracing life to its fullest, was what you wanted for him. But when he decided to travel the world right after the breakup—the thing you two had dreamed of doing together—it stung deeply.

Jungkook had always been the rational one, even if he was emotional at times. He understood why you made the decision you did, and though it hurt him as much as it did you, there was nothing more to say. When your words were final, that was it.

It didn’t help that you couldn’t stop yourself from checking in on him, stalking his social media to see him living his best life. Each post only made you feel worse, insecure about the choices you’d made. So, in a moment of frustration, you decided to turn things around. You would live on the edge, too. You’d make "risky" your new middle name.

You started small. Baby steps. You poured your glass of water right up to the brim, nearly overflowing, and then picked it up to drink, knowing full well there was a 99% chance you’d spill it. But you didn’t care. You lived dangerously now, and besides, hydration is key.

Next, you let your phone battery drop to 1%, watching the screen dim, your palms sweaty with the urge to just plug it in. But you resisted, holding out until it died completely. Of course, you rushed to charge it afterward, but you’d never admit that part.

Things escalated. You started crossing the street when the walk sign only had five seconds left, sprinting to the other side like a madwoman, just barely making it before the light changed.

But what really pushed you over the edge was seeing Jungkook’s latest post: him, laughing and carefree, with an unfamiliar woman by his side.

That’s when you signed up for skydiving, bungee jumping, and even got your motorcycle license. It was fun—really fun. But doing it all alone felt hollow. Without someone to share those experiences with, the thrill didn’t last long.

As winter approached, you found yourself at your cousin Yoongi’s apartment, practically begging him to join you on your latest venture—a two-week stay at a ski hostel to learn snowboarding.

“I’m not doing shit,” he said flatly, not even looking up from the couch.

“Pretty, pretty please, Yoongs.” You threw your best puppy-dog eyes at him, hoping for a miracle. Kneeling on his carpet, which was nowhere near plush enough to make this comfortable, you added, “I’ll do almost anything you want if you come with me. Pleeeeeease.”

“Everything?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Almost everything,” you clarified.

“Nah, I’m not going. Leave me alone.”

At that, you got up and threw yourself onto the couch beside him, clinging to his arm like a child. You put your face right up next to his, pouting dramatically. “Pwease, Yoongi oppa?”

“Ew, don’t call me that,” he said, surly grimacing in disgust.

“Okay, but only if you come with me! You won’t have to spend a cent. I’ve already paid for everything. Please, please, please.”

Yoongi sighed, and you could see him starting to waver, shooting you the occasional side-eye. “You’ll cover everything?”

“Everything,” you repeated, your eyes sparkling as you sensed victory.

“Fine.”

“Yesssss! I love you!” You kissed his cheek loudly, and he shoved you away with exaggerated disgust, though you knew he secretly enjoyed the affection. “I’ll pick you up tomorrow at 4 a.m. Pack your bags!”

“4 a.m.?” he groaned.

“Yup! See you then! Bye!”

“I never agreed to go that early! Hey, no! Wait—”

But you were already halfway out the door, knowing that if you stuck around to hear any more complaints, he’d change his mind in an instant.

Day 0

"I'm sure it's here... somewhere," you mumble desperately, trying to navigate your small, old car through the frosty streets of this tiny town. It's not that you're a bad driver, but Tony—your car, named after Iron Man—is getting on in years. With no power steering, driving these treacherous roads is far from enjoyable. Especially with a grumpy, moody Yoongi sitting beside you, not letting you think for a minute.

"I doubt that. You've got us stranded somewhere civilisation hasn't even reached."

"Oh, come on, I know it's here. And it's not as desolate as you're making it out to be! We saw another car, like, 20 minutes ago."

But Yoongi's right. You're no longer sure if you're heading in the right direction. Your phone died hours ago, leaving you without navigation, and there's been no sign of life for miles. You're hoping for a miracle—or at least that your memory of the route isn’t completely off—because the petrol’s running low. You've turned off the heater in the hopes of making it to the hostel without having to walk, but that means you’re both freezing, and Yoongi’s seconds away from murdering you. Not that there’s much left of your blood to spill, as the cold has probably frozen it solid by now.

"I regret agreeing to this, you know?"

"You've told me that already. Like, four times in the last... what? Five minutes?" Your teeth chatter uncontrollably, and you can’t help but silently agree with Yoongi, calling yourself all sorts of names for coming up with yet another idea that’s entirely out of character for you.

"And I'll keep saying it until we arrive. If we ever do." Yoongi’s breath fogs up as he speaks, and when Tony stutters—a sign that it’s running out of petrol or sheer willpower—you feel like you’re about to cry.

The snow hasn’t let up, towering in piles along the narrow street that seems to climb uphill endlessly. At this point, you’re not only terrified of being stranded but of Tony giving out and sliding all the way back down. All you can do is pray. Pray that this journey turns out better than it started, because, frankly, there’s not much that could make it worse.

"Wait, can you see that building?" You lean forward, nearly pressing your nose against the steering wheel, squinting to get a better look at the dark, blurred shape in the distance. Your windscreen wipers are losing their battle against the snow and frost, getting stuck midway, making visibility even worse. "Can you read the sign?"

Yoongi grumbles something inaudible as you both roll down your windows simultaneously, peering outside—not because it isn’t cold enough already, but because there’s no way to keep driving with a snow-covered windscreen. The freezing air and snow immediately assault your face, biting at your cheeks, nose, and everything else. Your nose starts running mercilessly, your eyes sting with tears that freeze on your lashes, making it nearly impossible to keep them open.

Yoongi’s not faring much better. His short hair, while practical, leaves his ears exposed to the cold, turning them bright red in an instant. Yet somehow, he’s still able to swear profusely—though you’re not sure if it’s aimed at you or the weather.

"It says ‘dinosaur,’" he spits out into the biting air.

"Yes! It’s ‘Dionysos!’ We’re here! I told you we weren’t lost." You regret smiling immediately, as the cold stabs at your teeth, making you fear they’ll shatter into a million pieces.

"Just park the fucking car."

As you manage to crest the hill, a small but beautiful town comes into view, beginning with the quaint little hostel you booked. And after you parked Tony right in front or it, you somehow manage to force the car windows back up, the frozen mechanisms protesting all the way with deafening screams. But you don’t care. With aching, frost-bitten limbs, you leap out of the car, grab your bags from the boot, and bolt inside the hostel, Yoongi practically bulldozing past you to get in.

Your arrival is marked by a tiny bell hanging over the entrance. While it’s not Christmas yet, the decorations for the advent season are in full swing. But most importantly, it’s warm. So wonderfully warm that you can’t help but take a deep breath, letting the heat thaw you from the inside out, as you discreetly wipe your nose on your sleeve.

"Oh, hey!" A man behind the reception desk greets you immediately. His glasses sit low on his nose, and a ridiculous Christmas jumper stretches across his tall frame.

"Hi! I’ve booked a room for two weeks. It’s under the name..."

Before you can finish, the man interrupts, saying your name. You glance warily at Yoongi, who, as expected, doesn’t care in the slightest. He’s already parked himself by the fireplace, looking like a cat forced to endure the cold for far too long.

"You’re our only guest this season." The man laughs uncomfortably, clearly sensing your suspicion.

"Oh." That’s all you manage, throwing another helpless glance at Yoongi, who remains completely uninterested.

"Yeah, I can’t compete with all the amenities that new hotel chain offers," he adds with a shrug.

"Oh! That’s a shame." You step forward, genuinely sorry to hear about the plight of small businesses, struggling to survive against the corporate giants.

"It is what it is. But I’m glad to have you here." He flashes you a dimpled smile, his perfectly aligned teeth momentarily dazzling you. "My name’s Namjoon, by the way. I’ll be your landlord, caretaker, cook, and whatever else you need during your stay. Just let me know, and I’ll make it happen."

You shake his hand, startled by how cold your fingers still are. "Thank you so much, Namjoon! You already know my name, but this grump glued to your fireplace is Yoongi."

"Honeymoon?" Namjoon asks, with a teasing grin.

"Ew, no." Yoongi’s voice drips with disgust, and he doesn’t even flinch under your glare.

"What he means is, no, we’re cousins, spending the holidays together."

"Forced to spend—"

"Willingly."

"Threatened to—"

"Shut up, you agreed! Don’t make me look like an idiot."

"You nearly killed us."

"Oh, I did not! Stop lying."

Namjoon clears his throat, cutting off your bickering. You both turn to him sheepishly, like children being scolded by a parent. Your cheeks are burning, not just from the warmth but from the embarrassment of your argument.

"I’ll give you a tour of the place, then?" Namjoon offers, smiling warmly.

"Yes, please," you reply, eager to move past the awkwardness as soon as possible.

Yoongi struggles to tear himself away from the fireplace, but eventually, both of you follow Namjoon, who remains all smiles despite your rather unorthodox arrival.

“So, this is the main area. You can relax by the fireplace whenever you like—it’s lit all the time,” Namjoon says, glancing at Yoongi, who still seems transfixed by the flames. “To the left are the rooms. There are only three, and yours is at the far end. I took the liberty of choosing the honeymoon suite because, well… you know what I thought. But honestly, it’s the best room here, so it’s no big deal.”

You swallow the urge to ask if it’s possible to have two separate rooms, but you’re running low on cash. Since you’ve become Yoongi’s unofficial sponsor for this trip, two rooms are out of the question. You just hope Yoongi has somehow outgrown his relentless snoring from childhood because, God forbid, you’ll be at your wit’s end if he ruins your sleep for two whole weeks.

“And to the right is my private room and the dining area. Any allergies I should know about?” Namjoon asks.

“No,” you and Yoongi reply in unison, sounding like textbook tourists. Not that you aren’t, but you’d rather it wasn’t so obvious.

“That’s good to hear. These days, everyone seems to have some kind of allergy or gut problem. I really don’t want to have to drive you to the hospital; it’s quite a distance from here…”

Namjoon stops mid-sentence, realising he’s rambling. You’re still standing there, bags in hand, coats on, now sweating from the warmth. You can only hope your body doesn’t rebel from the extreme change in temperature.

“This way, please,” Namjoon says, leading you towards your room. He swings the door open ceremoniously with an old-fashioned key in hand, and you and Yoongi follow, your heavy boots and coats disrupting the otherwise serene, festive atmosphere.

“Wow,” Yoongi murmurs, and it’s truly a sight that will stay with you forever.

It isn’t the room itself that takes your breath away, but the view. The wall facing the mountains is made entirely of glass, offering an uninterrupted view of the snow-covered slopes from peak to base. The storm has lessened without you noticing, revealing thick, heavy snowflakes gently falling, while the sun breaks through the grey clouds that shadowed your entire journey.

You watch as skiers and snowboarders carve their way down the mountainside, zigzagging effortlessly through the untouched snow. At the foot of the mountain, families are building snowmen and riding sleighs, laughter and joy visible even from this distance. It’s in moments like these, during those once-in-a-lifetime experiences, that your thoughts drift back to Jungkook. You find yourself wishing that things had turned out differently, that he could be here to share this with you.

You shouldn’t feel sad about it. You shouldn’t even be thinking about him, especially when he’s clearly moved on. Your relationship feels as distant and forgotten as a book written centuries ago—once beautiful, overflowing with fairytales too good to be true, but now irrelevant, no longer suited to withstand the test of time.

“It’s beautiful, isn’t it?” Namjoon’s voice pulls you back to the present, and for that, you’re grateful. Yoongi wouldn’t understand your feelings, and even if he did, he wouldn’t indulge your nostalgia over a past relationship—especially because it was your first and last.

“It is. Thank you for giving us this room, Namjoon. It’s more than I ever expected.”

Yoongi tosses his bag onto the floor by the bed, shrugs off his coat and shoes, and immediately flops onto the bed, his gaze fixed on the view.

“No worries, really. There’s a phone and a card with my number on it by the nightstand. If you need anything, come to reception. If I’m not there, knock on my door—I’m happy to help.”

Namjoon’s kindness and humility stir something in you. He’s incredibly good-looking, tall, and there’s something about his calm and friendly manner that makes you feel at ease. As he smiles at you, his dimples showing, you wonder if perhaps you might let yourself indulge in him a little—let him be the warmth you’ve been missing.

But for now, you’ll settle in. Let the next two weeks pass without forcing anything. You want to be swept up in whatever comes your way.

“I’m really happy I booked with you, Namjoon. You’ve been so kind, and this room is perfect. Thank you again.”

“Anytime.”

Your eyes linger on his for a moment longer than you’d admit was necessary, and you seize the opportunity to ask him a few more questions just to keep looking at him.

“So, I booked a snowboarding course through you. That starts tomorrow, right?”

“Yes, the instructor’s a friend of mine. He’ll be staying here too but won’t arrive until right before your lesson. You booked the classes for a full week, correct?”

“Yeah, I thought a week would be enough, and we’ll practice on our own after that.”

“That should work well. He’s great at what he does and an excellent teacher. But if you need more help, he’ll still be around for the rest of your stay.”

“That’s good.” You’re only half-listening. Namjoon’s dimples and kind eyes are distracting you too much to focus on his words.

“Oh, before I forget—anything in town worth seeing? I’d love to stroll around today since we’ve got no schedule.”

“I’m not leaving this room,” Yoongi mutters, his voice dripping with boredom, but neither you nor Namjoon pay him any attention.

“Hm, there’s not a lot, but you should visit ‘Jimin’s Pastries.’ He supplies my bread, and his pastries and coffee are to die for.”

“That sounds perfect. I think I’ll check it out straight away—I’m starving,” you say with a bashful laugh. “You coming?” You ask Yoongi coldly, knowing the answer.

“Nah, I’m good.”

“Suit yourself. So, how do I get there?” Immediately you turn back to Namjoon.

“I could show you?”

There’s a slight hesitance in Namjoon’s offer, but it only makes him more endearing. You smile genuinely, feeling a little more charmed than you’d like to admit. “Yeah, I’d like that.”

“Great, let’s go then.” His easy-going nature doesn’t falter, even when Yoongi calls after you, “Bring me back some food!”

There’s no need to answer; the door to the room has already closed behind you, leaving Yoongi behind as well.

“I’ll just need to fetch my coat real quick.”

You follow Namjoon to the reception, your eyes drawn to the way his hips move with each step, the subtle flexing right in front of you. It’s not as if you objectify every attractive man you meet, but Namjoon clearly takes care of himself, and there’s nothing you can really do. After all, you’re no saint, and Namjoon is definitely one of those reasons you’ll never take a vow of celibacy.

He doesn’t take long to return, emerging from his room with a rather thin coat hugging his body, making you feel a little ridiculous in your thick down jacket. But there’s no way you’re changing now.

Ever the gentleman, Namjoon holds the hostel door open for you with a small smile, and you thank him silently as the bell above the door chimes again softly. You don’t let your thoughts drift too far—don’t let them wander back to that time when Jungkook told you he always thought he’d meet his soulmate when he heard a bell the first time he saw them.

Because you’re sure that’s just folklore, just a whimsical story, something for entertainment. And even though Namjoon seems like someone nice you could spend time with, the fanciful idea that he might be your soulmate because of a little bell is absurd.

Outside, the cold hasn’t let up one bit, though the storm and heavy snowflakes have finally ceased. But this time, you welcome the chill, grateful for the contrast to the stifling heat of the hostel and the layers you’re bundled in.

You walk side by side, heading deeper into the small town, and now that the air is clearer, you notice fairy lights strung across the street, bare trees decorated with quaint Christmas ornaments, and every house and shop adorned for the season.

“So, how long have you been running the hostel?” you ask, unwilling and not comfortable nor confident enough to let the silence stretch for too long, opting for small talk that feels so much more safer.

“It’s been a few years now. I took over when my father couldn’t run it anymore.”

“That’s a responsible thing to do. I’m sure he’s proud of you.”

You hadn’t noticed before, but Namjoon’s hair isn’t black at all. Now, as the sunlight reflects off his soft-looking strands, you realise it’s a dark brown, making him look much younger.

“He is.” Namjoon smiles bashfully, glancing down briefly as though to hide a slight blush. “I just hope I can keep things going as well as he did.”

“I’m sure you will. The place is lovely.”

“Thanks. But what’s really lovely is Jimin’s, which is right here.”

Namjoon gestures towards a small shop you hadn’t noticed before, stopping just a short walk from the hostel. You realise now that everything in this tiny town is within easy reach, which you find very convenient.

And he’s right, ‘Jimin’s Pastries’ looks jut as charming as the hostel. The building is old but beautifully restored, its large windows inviting you in without detracting from its historic charm, as though it’s withstood the test of time. The large windows must be new, but you suspect the struts are original, as is the interior you can spot from outside, and it makes you marvel at it instantly.

Namjoon leads the way inside, once again opening the door for you to step through first. Again, a soft chime rings above the door, and the first thing you see is a man behind the counter, slightly shorter than Namjoon, with a smile as radiant as the sun itself, his eyes crinkling into crescents, making him look oh-so-youthful and impossibly welcoming.

“Hey, hyung! Who’s this you’ve brought with you?” the man asks brightly, his voice as musical as a singer’s.

“This is ___, she’s my guest for the next two weeks. ___, this is Jimin.”

“Nice to meet you.”

“Please, take a seat, make yourself at home! Namjoon, the usual?”

“Yeah, and some of your magic pastries. We’re starving, right?” Namjoon offers you a seat after taking your heavy coat, which you accept with a shy smile, feeling unaccustomed to such attentiveness.

“Yes, that sounds great. Thank you.”

“And what would you like to drink, ___?”

You squint up at the menu hanging above the counter while Namjoon takes his seat across from you after putting your coats on a rack near the entrance, but Jimin doesn’t give you much time to decide.

“Oh wait, I’ll bring you my special.”

With that, he sets to work, moving quickly around like a busy bee, and you take the opportunity to absorb and soak in the cosy, homey atmosphere.

“It’s nice, isn’t it?” Namjoon whispers over the sound of coffee beans being ground, leaning in slightly, his elbows resting on the table.

“It is. Thank you for showing me this place. I can’t wait to try everything—it all looks so delicious.”

The display of cakes and sweets is overwhelming, filled to the brim. The macarons, in particular, seem to call out to you, their bright colours practically begging to be tasted, looking almost too perfect to be real, knowing that you have to try them.

“I hope you like it as much as I do, or else I won’t know what to serve you for breakfast.”

You can’t help but giggle with Namjoon, his demeanour so warm and charming it’s impossible not to feel at ease.

“Here you go!” Jimin sings as he walks over with a tray nearly overflowing with pastries, balancing so many that even if you hadn’t eaten in days, you’re sure that there would still be leftovers. But you you’re not about to complain, secretly pleased you’ll get to taste almost everything on offer.

“The usual for Mister NJ, and here’s yours, beautiful,” Jimin winks cheekily, handing you a cup of coffee off the tray. You try to suppress the shy blush creeping up your cheeks. It’s really been a while since anyone’s flirted with you like this, and even if it’s maybe just playful, it’s not unwelcome, but simply unexpected.

“Thank you.”

You’re a bit surprised when Jimin pulls up a chair to sit between you and Namjoon, but thinking about it, it makes sense. There are no other customers at the moment, shop being completely empty except for you three, and it’s clear he’s close friends with Namjoon. Besides, you don’t mind; in fact, it’s comforting to be making these friendly connections, especially if you’re going to be here for two whole weeks. Maybe if these two weeks go well, you could see yourself coming back here one day.

Sensing the expectant looks from both men, their eyes flicking between your face and the cup of coffee in your hands, you finally take a sip—and are immediately thrown back to memories of Jungkook. The momentary peace you’d found is shattered as the familiar taste hits you. The coffee is good, wonderful even, just as perfect as you expected from Jimin’s first impression, but it tastes exactly like how Jungkook used to make it for you, though serving it in a normal cup seems rather…interesting now.

But Once, you loved the aftertaste of sweet iced Americano, loved the aftertaste after Jungkook had put his lips on yours. But now you’re alone. Now, you’re without him, and there’s nothing you can do but swallow it down, hoping your expression doesn’t give you away—hoping they don’t see how broken you really are and that you’re lying. Lying that you’re not stuck in an all time low for years now, lying that you’re not trying to fix your pride since.

“Wow, it tastes amazing!”

But both men jut blink at you now, and it’s only then that you realise your hands are trembling slightly, and that the smile you’ve tried so hard to put on doesn’t feel as genuine as you’d hoped.

“What’s wrong?” Jimin’s uneasy in an instant, his brow creasing. “Don’t you like it? Would you prefer something else?”

They both look rather too concerned for their own goods now. Jimin, too, tries to take the cup from your hands, but you hold it closer to you. It’s kind of sweet how strangers seem so empathetic towards you, and it somehow soothes the ache in your chest, even if it’s only a little, but not quite enough to make you forget.

“No! It’s perfect. I swear. It’s just that it reminds me of someone who’s no longer in my life.”

“Oh, my condolences.” Namjoon stretches out his hand, resting it gently on your lower arm with sad eyes.

“No! Oh gosh, no, it’s my ex. He’s alive, we just broke up.”

While Namjoon’s face falls into an embarrassed, crooked smile, taking his hand away, Jimin’s lights up like the fairy lights outside in the dawn. He wastes no time sliding closer to you, his wooden chair squeaking lightly on the tiled floor.

“Oh, tell me about it. Was it recent?”

You want to say yes, because even though it’s been a while since the split, it still feels like it was just hours ago. But at the same time, the time spent apart from Jungkook feels like an eternity, too unbearable to survive, really.

“Uhm, no, it’s been years, actually.”

And that shifts the whole room into chaos. Jimin doesn’t miss a beat before suggesting, “You just need to get properly dicked down, one good time.”

Namjoon looks even more embarrassed, trying in vain to get Jimin to shut up, while you sit there watching them argue about whether or not Jimin’s suggestion is the right way to help you forget your ‘scruffy ex’—his words, not yours or Namjoon’s.

“Actually, I’m not really interested in finding someone new at the moment.”

“See! I told you! Just let her be!” Namjoon leans back in his chair with a proud, triumphant smile on his face, crossing his arms as if he’s known you for years, which, obviously, he doesn’t. His glasses slide down his nose, making him look less convincing than he should.

“Oh, shut up, she just doesn’t know it yet. Maybe we could set her up with C. I think they’d look cute together.”

“I don’t know, man, you’re kind of right, but he’s not looking for anyone either.”

“That’s perfect! Wait, tell me something about yourself, I need to check if you’d vibe with him.” Jimin again leans in close, his elbows resting on the table between you, hands framing his chiseled jawline as he looks at you with sparkling, excited eyes.

You’re not sure what’s just happened, or who this ‘C’ is. And especially, you’re unsure how to answer the request to ‘tell them something about yourself’. Do you tell them about the introverted self you once were or maybe still are deep down? Your default so to say? Or do you describe the ‘new’, in your opinion uncomfortable self you’re desperately trying to become? At this point, you’re not even sure who you are, and the realisation exhausts you more than the drive here did.

“I…hm…I’m more the type of person who’s calm and doesn’t like a lot of adventures or risky things. So, I don’t think there’s really anyone out there who could handle that.” Yeah, great way to spark someone’s interest—talking down on yourself should definitely be added to your list of traits.

“Oh, that’s perfect. C’s been out of his mind for years. He definitely needs someone to balance him out. The dude’s mental.”

You raise an eyebrow at that, eyes flickering between Namjoon and Jimin. If he’s mental, why would Jimin want you to get involved with him? You’ve got enough of your own problems; babysitting a potential partner is the last thing you want to do.

“Oh no, he’s not mental mental, just a bit too reckless. He’s searching for something no one really understands. I reckon he’s just looking for love, or to be loved, but he’s obviously not finding it.”

“Oh... I see…” You nod vaguely, trying to piece together the information being thrown at you without getting whiplash. “But, uh, who is C, exactly?”

“He’s your snowboard instructor, actually,” Namjoon chimes in. From the look on his face, he’s completely on board with Jimin’s idea as well.

“And his name is C?”

“We call him that. It’s short for BSC, which is short for Babystarcandy.” Jimin beams at you, as if this explanation makes perfect sense.

“I reckon that’s not his actual name?” You deadpan.

“Gosh, no! That would be ridiculous.” Jimin waves his hands exaggeratedly while Namjoon chuckles. “His actual name is—”

The loud ringtone of Namjoon’s phone makes all three of you jump, Celine Dion’s “My Heart Will Go On” blasting from his coat.

“Sorry, I’ll just get that.” Namjoon stumbles off his chair, tripping over his own feet. He grabs his coat at the last moment, pulling it to the floor with him as the hook breaks under the weight.

“Not again,” Jimin sighs, rubbing his eyes with both hands as he sinks further into his chair. “I swear to God, one day—”

“Why am I calling myself?” Namjoon wonders aloud before quickly answering, “Hello?”

You can’t hear the other side of the conversation from across the room, but Namjoon doesn’t seem confused for long. He responds joyfully, “Of course. We’re heading back now... sure... bye.”

“You’re going to pay for that repair,” Jimin mutters as soon as Namjoon hangs up and gets to his feet, tucking his phone into his trousers and pulling on his coat.

“Of course, I always do. That was Yoongi, by the way. He’s hungry and wants us to bring him food. Sooo, could you pack up all the pastries?”

“Yes, of course!” Jimin jumps up immediately, gathering everything together while you watch longingly as he takes the macarons too. But you’re not too sad—you’ll just gobble them as soon as you’re back in your room.

You stand, finishing your coffee in one go, knowing that even though you can taste the caffeine from how strong it is, it won’t do much once your stomach’s full. You’re simply too knackered after today to stay awake longer than necessary.

“Yoongi called you from your hostel phone?”

“Yeah, he didn’t know another way.”

“I can’t with him; he’s so shameless sometimes.” Namjoon helps you into your coat, a gesture you’d like to get used to again—the simple act is just too sweet not to fall in love with.

“Ah, I don’t mind. I like people like him; they’re always honest.”

“Yeah, you’re probably right.”

“Here come the treats!” Jimin sings as he swings open the door to the back room. The pastries are now securely packed in a paper bag, which he hands to you. “Thanks for coming by, and make sure to come tomorrow too. We’re not done talking, especially after you meet C in person!”

You can’t help but laugh with them both. It’s refreshing to feel joy and fun around you without having to put yourself at risk with some nonsense activity. But if you’re honest with yourself, you wouldn’t have met them if it weren’t for that very activity.

“Thanks, Jimin. I appreciate it. And we’ll see if I’m still alive after tomorrow.”

“You will be—C will take good care of you,” Jimin winks again, and with that, the door chime sounds as Namjoon opens it for you. “Goodnight!”

“Goodnight,” you and Namjoon say in unison, stepping into the cold night as the wind bites at your face again. The fairy lights now illuminate the whole street, ornaments reflecting their red and gold hues, looking like something straight out of a film. Children are still up, playing in the snow and running around, while couples stroll along the pavement.

It’s a scene you wish you could see every day, and as you make your way back to the hostel with Namjoon by your side, you can’t help but glance up at him now and then as he talks about the small details of the town’s history, C and Jungkook momentarily forgotten.

Day 1

You regret bringing Yoongi with you. So much so, you want to cry and never stop.

It’s not like he’s bad company—not all the time, anyway—but sharing a room with him puts everything into perspective. His snoring hasn’t lessened one bit since childhood; in fact, you’re pretty sure it’s gotten worse. There’s no way you’ll get an ounce of rest if you keep sleeping in the same room, so you decide to ask Namjoon at breakfast if there’s any chance you can switch to the other spare room.

Lying awake all night until Yoongi got up at ass o’clock, leaving the room with his laptop and other gear, had you contemplating every life decision you’ve ever made, including the ones yet to come. Isn’t it ridiculous what you’ve got yourself into again? Sure, you’re kind of sporty, but when it comes to risky sports like snowboarding, you’d much rather watch others do it than try it yourself but here you are.

You’re sure if Jungkook had seen the way you’ve been living these past few years, he’d laugh. Not that he’d ridicule you—he’s not that type—but you’re certain the clown you’ve become would disgust him as much as it disgusts you.

You’re not sure if it’s healthy to still be so hung up on your ex, or if it’s just normal when you’ve lost the love of your life. Normal in the sense that every thought circles back to him, like you’ve taken the fall for some drug called Jeon Jungkook.

You’ll probably have to search the internet for a rehab clinic that specialises in self-inflicted heartbreak because after this adventure, there’s no way you’re doing anything like this again. Enough is enough. Especially when there’s possibly, just maybe, a potential partner—someone cozy and inviting, like Namjoon—who might actually like you for who you really are.

It’s still early, but you need to get up and grab some breakfast, knowing today’s course will be physically draining if you attempt it on an empty stomach. You’re certain that dragging Yoongi out will take extra time you don’t have to spare. The thought of making a bad first impression on C terrifies you, not only because he’s a stranger, but because, as Namjoon said, he’s coming here just for you.

Groaning, you force yourself out of bed. The room has cooled slightly overnight, which wasn’t a problem under the thick duvet, but now you can’t seem to handle the cold as well as you usually do. Rushing into the en-suite, you’re first greeted by the warmth of the heated floor, and then by the horrifying sight of your reflection.

“Please, don’t,” you plead, as if your reflection could magically change the image of your swollen face, a result of the ridiculous amount of pastries you munched last night. Your dark circles look more like war paint than the result of a restless night—a far cry from a cute quirk.

There’s no point in using much makeup, not when you’re going to be snowboarding—or rather learning how to—all day, so you settle for a bit of concealer. It takes a lot of mental pep talk to leave the blush behind, knowing the cold will soon give you rosy cheeks and a red nose the second you step outside the hostel.

Getting dressed is a bit easier; you throw on some thermal black gear, braid your hair into two sections, and leave the room in search of either Namjoon or Yoongi.

It’s no surprise to find Yoongi by the fireplace again, empty plate and coffee nearby, but seeing Namjoon beside him—Yoongi clicking away on his laptop while Namjoon raps into a microphone—leaves you speechless. There’s a whole side of Namjoon you hadn’t seen before. Sure, you only met him 12 hours ago, but you never would’ve imagined, in a million years, hearing him angrily spitting line after line. And despite his usual softness, this harshness leaves you nearly gasping for air.

What are you supposed to do? You’ve always had a weak spot for bad boys, men who exude confidence. And Namjoon is definitely giving off that vibe right now.

“Oh baby, what’s your name?”

The whimper that escapes your mouth is so embarrassing, especially when both men look up at you—Namjoon halting mid-rap—that you can’t, for the life of you, figure out what’s wrong with you. Are you really this pathetic, or was Jimin right all along? Maybe you just need a good shag to recalibrate your brain to normal. It’s been years, and considering the state you’re in now, something’s surely got to change.

You muster whatever dignity you have left and greet them as casually as possible, “Good morning.”

Yoongi, ever the ray of sunshine, doesn’t bother turning away from his laptop, clicking away as if you’re just a fly that’s wandered in. But Namjoon? He meets your eyes with a smile that could rival the dawn itself.

“Morning! Ready for breakfast?”

“Yes, please.”

You’re smitten, and there’s no hiding it as he leads you to the dining area. A table is already set, and you recognise Jimin’s bread in an instant. Knowing how hungry you are after your late-night binge, you waste no time sitting down, your eyes glued to the treats and toppings on offer.

“Fancy a coffee?”

“Black would be perfect!”

“Not a sweet tooth?” Namjoon jokes, pouring you a cup from the thermos flask, the rich aroma battling with the scent of the food.

“Not in the morning.” You smile up at him.

“Probably because you’re sweet enough straight out of bed.”

His wink nearly makes you faint, and it’s clear that while Namjoon’s good with his tongue when rapping, he’s also very smooth with it. You wonder if…

“I guess so,” you mumble, too flustered to look him in the eye now.

He chuckles quietly and sits opposite you, not bothering to eat himself.

“Not hungry?” you ask, feeling a bit more composed as you distract yourself by preparing your breakfast.

“Nope, I just ate. Just wanted to keep you company.”

“That’s nice of you, thanks. I really hate eating alone, though I do it almost every meal. So, I appreciate it.”

“No worries, I’m happy to keep you company.”

“So, you rap?”

A lazy smirk forms on Namjoon’s face, his head tilted up slightly, and you know full well he’s aware of what he did to your hormones minutes ago. He only hums in confirmation.

Cocky. But you like it, and it suits him. You just hope he’s not too confident—that would be a massive turnoff.

“Side hustle or hobby?”

“Hobby, but Yoongi’s been putting a bee in my bonnet, to be honest.”

“He’s persistent when it comes to talent.”

“I wouldn’t say I’m talented, but he’s a dope producer. I didn’t recognise him at first, but man, I’m lucky to have him here. A literal world star staying in my hostel. I’m gonna have to make a wall of fame or something.”

You snort at that because as ridiculous as it sounds seeing Yoongi on a ‘wall of fame’, Namjoon’s not wrong. Yoongi is world-famous, though he prefers to keep a low profile, which you admire. Well, most of the time. Him being this tight with the expenses of the trip leaves a bit of a sour taste in your mouth—not caused by the coffee, that’s for sure.

“Are you famous too, by any chance?”

You snort again, “You wish.”

“Shame.”

“Tell me about it. Even though I’m the broke one, I’m still the one sugar-mommying him,” you mumble through your bites, not wanting to waste time without filling your stomach.

Namjoon’s laugh lights up the morning even further, and you’re all too glad you booked this hostel. It would’ve been miserable spending your time alone while Yoongi’s off doing his own thing every chance he gets.

“Any chance of getting a separate room?”

“Why?”

“I can’t spend another night lying awake because of Yoongi’s snoring.”

You look at each other, and suddenly the inconvenience doesn’t seem as bad as it did all night. Namjoon’s laugh is going to be your secret weak spot from now on.

“Sure, I’ll just move your luggage if you haven’t unpacked yet.”

“That’d be great. Thanks so much.”

“No worries.” Namjoon watches you for a bit while you eat, like it’s the most fascinating thing happening to him.

You don’t mind at all—it’s not awkward—but you can tell you’re running out of time by how slowly you’re eating.

“When do we have to leave? Is C here already?”

“Yeah, he got here a few hours ago but went straight to the slopes. You’ve got a few more minutes. I’ve sorted out some gear for you at Hope’s. He’ll give you everything you need for the week.”

It’s a relief knowing Namjoon has thought of everything, especially since you’re not fond of surprises or poorly planned outings.

“You really thought of everything, didn’t you?”

“It’s my job, ___.” He winks at you again, and if you weren’t so focused on shovelling food down, you’d probably melt into your seat.

“All done,” you mumble through your last bite, crumbs shamelessly falling as you stand up.

“Perfect timing. I told Yoongi how to get to Hope’s; it’s not far.”

Not wanting to thank him yet again like a broken record, you just nod and follow him to the main room, where Yoongi’s already by the door, waiting. You’re not sure why he’s so eager when he didn’t even want to come in the first place, but you don’t dwell on it as you say goodbye to Namjoon and head out, Yoongi handing you your coat.

The walk to Hope’s? You’re not really sure despite Namjoon mentioning the name twice, but to the guy who runs the ski and snowboard equipment hire shop indeed isn’t far.

As soon as you step into his shop, you’re hit with the sight of all kinds of winter sports gear and old-school rap blaring at full volume—likely coming from some speakers behind the counter where the seller greets you.

“Hey! How can I help you?”

“Hey, we’re guests of Namjoon and—”

“___ and Yoongi! Of course, Namjoon’s already told me! I’m Hoseok!”

“Weird.”

“Shut up,” you hiss at Yoongi. “That’s perfect. It’s our first time, and there’s no way we’d know what we need.”

“I’ve got you. Just follow me, I’ll start by getting the right boots for you.”

“Thanks.”

There are so many boots in all sorts of colours and sizes that you’re not sure if they’re all for hire or if some are for sale, but it doesn’t really matter. There’s no way you’re going snowboarding again after these two weeks, so you’d gladly pick whatever’s the comfiest.

Yoongi, on the other hand, doesn’t seem to share that thought, picking out the most expensive-looking boots. Truth be told, they do look the fanciest, and if you were as loaded as him, you’d go wild too. It’s with a jolt that you remember you’re the one paying for all this, and there’s no way you could afford the ones Yoongi’s holding up to inspect.

“Put them back,” you hiss, slapping his hand, scolding him for being so careless with your expenses.

“Ouch, that’s rude.”

“I’m not paying for them. Put them back before you damage them and I end up bankrupt.”

“So, what sizes do you usually wear?” Hoseok interrupts, completely unfazed by your bickering.

“Seven and a half.”

“Three and a half.”

“Dwarf.”

“Bigfoot.”

“I’ll bring you one size up,” Hoseok says with a smile. “Any particular colour you fancy?”

“Purple.”

“Black.”

“Got it, I’ll be right back.”

He leaves you both at the rack, disappearing behind a curtain into the back room.

“Could you stop embarrassing me, please?”

“I didn’t do shit, ___. Stop whining.”

“You’re unbelievable.”

“Need I remind you I’m doing you a favour here? Where’s the respect?”

“Sorry, oppa,” you bat your eyelashes at him mockingly.

“Say that again and I’m leaving.”

“How? Tony’s petrol’s empty. You’re going to walk home?”

“Bet.”

Just as you roll your eyes, Hoseok returns with two shoeboxes and two helmets, placing them down on a bench.

“I’ve brought you brand new ones. There weren’t many in your sizes I’d be comfortable renting out.”

Yoongi and you sit on opposite sides of the boxes while Hoseok removes the packaging from the new boots. Yours are purple, but just the laces and stitching—the rest is black, which gives them a more grown-up look compared to kids’ shoes. You fall in love with them instantly and eagerly grab one to put it on. But no luck.

Even though they’re fully open, you can’t seem to get your foot inside, despite your efforts. You stomp on the ground, pulling at the boot with both hands, but it’s no use. Yoongi, of course, isn’t struggling at all—typical, he’s good at everything.

“Here, let me help,” Hoseok kneels in front of you, securing your calf and the boot, angling the heel to the floor. “Now stand up and push your foot in.”

You do as he says, and with a soft, satisfying ‘plop’, your foot slides in without a hitch. “Thanks! That was easy!”

You repeat the process with the other boot, tightening the laces and clasps, then stand to take a few steps. You stumble slightly, not used to the weight and bulk of the boots, but soon get the hang of it.

“They need to fit quite snugly. When you’re fully geared up, make sure to fasten them as tight as possible. Otherwise, you’ll go flying, and your board will stay on the snow.”

“Oh. Right. Okay. Yeah, sure.”

You don’t like this. You don’t like the idea or the mental image of being catapulted out of your boots while your snowboard says c’est la vie.

To your amazement, the helmets Hoseok picked for you and Yoongi fit perfectly as well.

“If you’re feeling good, let’s get you sorted with snowsuits, yeah?”

You nod and attempt to follow Hoseok, but Yoongi pulls you back down onto the bench, your ass hitting the hard surface with a rather painful thud.

“Take them off, idiot. How are you going to get a suit on with those still on?”

Ugh… it’s obvious, really, but you’re too stressed and anxious about snowboarding to function properly. It’s in moments like this that you start spiralling, regretting your decision all over again. You’re not sure what gave your thoughts away, but Yoongi seems to notice the shift in your mood, as he rests a hand on your knee.

“Hey, it’s fine. I’m here. Don’t stress.”

You lock eyes with him, and you can see a bit of regret there. It’s normal for you two to bicker and take the piss out of each other, but it’s also normal for you both to care. You love each other, like cousins do, and part of you regrets ever thinking you’d made a mistake by bringing him on this trip. Because honestly, there’s no one else in your life right now you’d rather do this with.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be, it’s all good. You’ve got this, okay?”

You just nod, loosening the clasps and laces to take the boots off and helmet, then walk in your socks over to where Hoseok is rummaging through racks of snowsuits.

It doesn’t take long for Hoseok to get your right sizes and for Yoongi to disappear into the changing room first. You’re not really sure how to start a conversation with him, but thankfully you’re saved by the shop’s phone ringing.

“Excuse me,” Hoseok smiles politely, walking towards the counter where the phone is obviously placed.

“Hope’s, how can I help you?”

You hold the snowboard jacket in front of your chest, admiring its intricate design in the mirror hanging in front of you, trying not to obviously listen in on the call.

“Jaykaaaaay.”

You freeze, the nickname ringing all sorts of alarm bells in your head. There’s no way it’s Jungkook; like, literally, there might be a million other people with that nickname. You need to calm down somehow, because if your anxiety rises any further than it already has, you’re sure you’re going to die from heart failure.

Hoseok’s repeated and drawn-out calling of this nickname doesn’t help in the slightest, and you reckon that if he repeats it one more time, you’d punch him in the face, even though you’re so not the type to be violent. But desperate times call for desperate measures.

Thankfully, the cheerful shouts stop, and Hoseok listens in until he locks eyes with you, a smile forming. You try to figure out if all the people in this town have such perfect teeth, if there’s a dentist who works magic, or if everyone just has perfect high-end genetics you could only dream of.

“Yeah, they’re here at the moment.”

You raise an eyebrow at him. What do Yoongi and you have to do with this phone call?

“Just a few more minutes. I’ll send them to the beginners’ hill when we’re finished, yeah?”

Okay, hold up—it must be the instructor on the other line, and Namjoon and Jimin called him C, but Hoseok just called him Jaykay, which has nothing to do with C nor BSC. Was it even BSC? Anyway. There’s a very real chance that it’s definitely not Jungkook, because, shame on you, you’ve seen him post a picture from Hawaii last night on socials, which, obviously, isn’t here.

You don’t feel the need to ask Hoseok who it was or what’s going on with these multiple nicknames. For all you care, it could be a 50-year-old, and you’re stressing yourself out for nothing.

Hoseok comes to your side after he’s hung up, and Yoongi emerges at this moment too, though he’s not modelling his snowboard suit but has it draped over his arm.

“Fits,” is all Yoongi says, nodding once in Hoseok’s direction.

“Perfect, now it’s your turn.” Hoseok gestures for you to the changing room, and you don’t waste any more time. The faster you’re out of here, the faster this day is over, and that’s all you want as the snowboarding course gets closer.

“Thanks,” you mumble, searching for Yoongi’s eyes for just a little more reassurance, but he’s already too busy having a normal and civil conversation with Hoseok, something you wish he’d do more often with you.

There’s not much room in the changing room, especially when the snowboard trousers are this wide and baggy, so you fall against the walls multiple times, trying not to faceplant onto the floor.

“You good?” Hoseok’s voice is heard from outside, and it’s so unbelievably embarrassing realising that Yoongi had no struggle trying the clothes on because there wasn’t a sound coming from him. Not because the walls are thick or soundproof—no, because he’s simply doing well, like every human being should.

“Yeah!” you call, hoping that the high-pitched tone of your voice doesn’t give you away. But who are you kidding? There’s the low but unmistakable giggle and some mumbled words from Yoongi, followed by Hoseok’s shrill laughter.

You’re going to kill Yoongi, going to push him down the hill and watch him become a snowball and crash into the abyss of a glacier. Stupid moron—you should have left him at home and come alone, and the sharp tug of your jacket’s zipper punctuates your resentment perfectly.

The anger fades as fast as it came, because you look like the coolest professional snowboarder on earth. You twist and turn, make a bum-check, but realise there’s not much to see in these oversized clothes. Still, you feel good in them, especially as your body heat multiplies, which is the best sign that you’ll survive all day in the snow.

Knowing you’ll have to leave as soon as you’re finished, you take the jacket off and rip the price tag away. After undoing the trousers and doing the same, you don’t care if the gear is expensive. Even if so, you’d still use it for sledging or in case of a blizzard or something. You’re sure you’ll get creative with its use.

Sipping everything back up, you collect your down jacket and step out of the changing room, not as elegantly as usual, but more with a rustle and a slight swaying due to the fabric. You can’t suppress the smile that grows on your lips, Yoongi and Hoseok looking equal parts amused and approving of your appearance. You’re all going to get a good laugh out of it when you’re wearing the snowboard boots as well, and that’s all you need right now—humour to suppress the anxiety.

Two snowboards are already lined up. Hoseok helps you into the boots again, while Yoongi masters dressing himself like a real grown-up.

“C’s going to adjust the boot holders on the snowboards for you, so you can just take them with you as they are. They fit your height. And you can leave your shoes and jackets here and collect them whenever you’re finished for the day.”

“That’d be great.”

“Thanks, Jwe-Hope.”

You side-eye Yoongi. Why’s he getting soft with Hoseok? And why does he give him yet another nickname, as if the man doesn’t already have enough?

“No prob, Yoongi hyung,” Hoseok says in an exaggeratedly playful tone, while Yoongi dabs him goodbye.

You’re fascinated by how Hoseok managed to melt the ‘Ice King’s’ heart in the few minutes you were away, and it’s even more fascinating how Yoongi just heads for the door without you even having paid yet.

“Yo, wait! I need to pay!”

“Yep, I’m outside having a smoke.”

There’s nothing you can do as Yoongi leaves without even turning back, your shoulders dropping in defeat.

“I’d like to pay, please.”

Hoseok nods with a smile and you follow him to the register. He scans one tag after the other, the price skyrocketing while your bank account starts to scream in the background.

“That’ll be 899 dollars,” he beams.

Your smile is wobbly, as is your hand as you hand over your credit card, knowing that this trip will be more expensive than you ever thought.

“Thanks again, Hoseok.”

“No problem, and please call me Hope.”

“Sure, Hope,” you say, securing your credit card in the inner pocket of your jacket. “Have a nice day, and see you later.”

“See ya, bye!” He waves enthusiastically as you head for the door, interrupting Eminem’s Godzilla with your stomping and rattling. How ironic.

Yoongi’s leaning against the shop’s wall as you step outside, just about to take a drag of his cigarette as he notices you glaring at him. Snatching the cigarette from his lips, you take a drag yourself.

“Thought you quit.”

“Give me a break, I need to calm my nerves.”

“Reckon some coke would be better, you’d feel invincible and wouldn’t be scared shitless.”

“Reckon you could just shut up, yeah?”

He just laughs as you give him his cigarette back and make your way to where you assume the slope is.

“This way.”

You stop in your tracks, taking a deep breath with closed eyes. You don’t want to go off at him again; you’ll need every ounce of energy, and wasting it by bickering isn’t the way to go.

Reluctantly, with the snowboard and helmet awkwardly clasped in your hands, you manage to follow Yoongi, though walking on asphalt is rather uncomfortable in these boots, though the walk might be again very short.

True to that, arriving in a few minutes at the beginner’s hill is a bit sobering. The hill’s neither high nor steep, even kids with sledges would probably call it boring, but you don’t mind one bit. Honestly, it’s perfect for you. No real chance of getting hurt and ending up like one of those cute little animals from Happy Tree Friends.

Off to the side, there’s the lift access and the main slopes, with skiers and snowboarders already queuing up for their first or maybe their nth lift of the day.

One snowboarder shooting down the steepest hill, which just so happens to be the only one of its kind, catches your attention. He’s dressed head-to-toe in black, and the way he moves is hypnotic. You can’t help but think he must be a pro, maybe even an Olympian.

“Look! He’s so good.” You point him out to Yoongi, who shifts from looking bored to mildly impressed.

“Why’s he coming our way, though?”

“No way.”

But it’s true. He’s definitely your instructor. And not some fifty-year-old guy, either. There’s a lump in your throat you can’t quite swallow, especially because this guy’s height seems just a little too familiar… maybe too much like Jungkook’s. As far as you remember, at least.

You try to reason with yourself. Tell yourself there’s no way this is happening, because he’s got to be in Hawaii—Instagram stories and TikToks made that pretty clear, playing the role of a drunk uncle on family gatherings who can’t keep personal matters shut. You cling to that thought as the man stops a few feet away from you. You cling to it when he takes off his helmet, revealing just a black balaclava. You cling to it even when his eyes give him away.

But when he pulls off the balaclava, all you’re left with is the crushing realisation that you’re absolutely, without a doubt, screwed.

“Hey.”

Jungkook’s voice hasn’t changed much—maybe it’s a little rougher, could be also just from the cold—but it’s still the sound that makes you want to cry. Or run. Honestly, either would work right now.

His eyes lock onto yours, and all you can do is stare, wide-eyed, as if he’s some unreal figure, like a fairytale character suddenly brought to life.

You’ve watched Jungkook mature over the last few years—not in person, but still. You’ve seen the piercings he’s got and the tattoos currently hidden beneath his gear and gloves, and you’re suddenly more than aware that even though he was perfect back then and you shouldn’t have persuaded him to get piercings and tattoos, he’s become the one man you always knew he would be, if not more.

“S’up,” Yoongi just nodding.

That makes Jungkook glance at him, almost as if he’s only just noticed he’s standing there. A small frown forms on his face, but it disappears just as quickly as it came, and he holds out his gloved fist for Yoongi to bump.

“I’m Jeon Jungkook, your instructor.”

“Min Yoongi.”

“The producer Min Yoongi?”

“The one and only.”

Jungkook glances back and forth between you and Yoongi several times, and it dawns on you—he doesn’t know you and Yoongi are cousins. Yoongi was abroad the entire time you were with Jungkook and only came back right after the split, so of course, he never met him. And this… this is something you can work with. Maybe you can use it to keep Jungkook at arm’s length, or at the very least, avoid a complete emotional meltdown if Jungkook’s indeed moved on.

So you laugh softly and link your arm with Yoongi’s, resting your head on his shoulder, who just looks down at you, clearly confused by your sudden affection but, to his credit, says nothing. He knows you well enough to trust there’s a reason behind it.

“___.”

“Jungkook.”

“You two know each other?”

“Yeah.”

“She’s my ex.” Jungkook’s smile isn’t the warm, beautiful one you remember. No, it’s that slightly unhinged smile, the one with his head tilted just so, and it makes you silently gulp.

“That ex?” Yoongi asks, even though he knows full well there’s only one. You reckon he caught on quickly to the game you’re playing.

You hum in agreement, but Jungkook can’t help himself. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

Luckily, Yoongi knows how to steer a conversation. “Aren’t we supposed to be learning how to snowboard?”

There’s a brief pause, and you see the way Jungkook’s nostrils flare slightly as he takes a deep, calming breath.

“Yes, sorry. Let’s get started.”

Jungkook bends down to unclip his boots from his board and stands up again, tossing his board into the snow so it sticks upright. Yoongi follows suit, shoving his board into the snow like it’s second nature. You try to copy them but fail miserably, wondering how they made it look so easy when the snow’s this solid.

“Here, let me help.” Yoongi, surprisingly, helps you without his usual snarky comments about your lack of strength.

“Alright,” Jungkook claps once to grab your attention. “Before we get into any of the fancy stuff, let’s talk theory. Snowboarding’s all about awareness. It’s not just physical—you’ve got to keep your head in the game.”

“Awareness? Like, where you’re looking?” Yoongi asks dryly, acting dumb you know he isn’t.

“Exactly. Where you’re looking, where your body’s pointing,” Jungkook gestures bizarrely between you and himself, barely glancing at Yoongi. “That’s where you’ll go. Simple as that. If you’re distracted—by, say, something or someone—you’ll lose focus. And losing focus means losing control.”

Yoongi, unfazed, just rolls with it, clearly enjoying the little drama Jungkook seems keen to stir up. “Makes sense. Keep your eyes on the path ahead, yeah?”

“Exactly, mate. Eyes forward, always. But it’s more than just looking. It’s feeling the terrain beneath you. Even when you’re standing still, you’re never really still. You need to sense the environment. Be present, y’know?”

You nod, though in reality, you’ve got no clue what he’s talking about.

“Some people, though,” Jungkook continues, “they get distracted easily. Head in the clouds. Or… elsewhere.”

Oh, you’re not letting that slide. Whether he’s jabbing at you, Yoongi, or both, you’re not having it. “Could you just explain the theory without the snide remarks?”

Jungkook’s taken aback, holding both hands up in mock surrender. “Hey, just trying to make sure we’re all on the same page.”

You just shake your head, and he carries on.

“Right. Balance—this is key. It’s all about your centre of gravity. Too stiff, and you’ll fall over. Too loose, and you’ll just flop around.”

“Don’t want that, do we?” Yoongi smirks, clearly challenging Jungkook to keep his little act going.

“No, mate, you really don’t. Trust me. You need to find that sweet spot—controlled, but relaxed. Kind of like…” he glances at you, “when you’ve got things under control in your life, but you’re still going with the flow, yeah?”

Your eyes narrow at him, but you bite your tongue. There’s no point in calling him out when Yoongi’s clearly enjoying winding him up.

“Sounds like life advice, that. Keepin’ balance, goin’ with the flow.”

“Yeah, something like that.” Jungkook mutters under his breath, “Not that everyone takes it to heart.”

Oh, no, he did not just say that. You never expected Jungkook to be this petty. He’s the one who moved on first. “What did you just say?”

“Nothing. Anyway, let’s get warmed up. Let’s do some exercises using the hill.”

You thought that ‘warming up’ would mean some jumping jacks and stretching, but oh, how wrong you are.

Jungkook has you and Yoongi running up and down the beginner’s hill without regret, and honestly, you can now confirm—it’s very much steeper than it looks.

While Jungkook just looks on, you and Yoongi can’t stop laughing and joking about how you are both panting like you’d just run a marathon, earning you multiple scoldings from Jungkook to stay focused. Not that it matters much, considering the only thing worth focusing on was trying to catch your breath—you nearly passed out twice at this point.

Despite Yoongi also being knackered, he still holds up better than you, but you can’t help but to clap him on the ass with a sarcastic “atta girl” more than once, which not only annoys him but seems to make Jungkook’s jaw clench in irritation too.

After what feels like the tenth climb, Jungkook finally calls it, walking towards you. “Enough. Short break.”

You and Yoongi groan in relief, collapsing onto the snow, letting your breathing slow down gradually. Only now, as you lie there exhausted, do you notice how beautiful the day is, the sky almost completely clear of clouds. From the position of the sun, you reckon it’s close to lunchtime, your stomach already growling in gratitude at the thought of food after all this exercise.

Turning your head to the side, you glance over at Yoongi, who’s also lying on the cool snow, admiring the sky. Suddenly, you feel sentimental. You really hit the jackpot having him as a cousin—he’s probably the most reliable person you know. It’s moments like this, especially when he turns to look at you with those soft eyes and that warm smile, that remind you how much you appreciate him. Reaching out, you intertwine your hands, knowing he’ll understand the rare moment of affection and let it happen for once.��

“Thanks for doing this with me.”

“Anytime.” Yoongi squeezes your hand, his gummy smile spreading across his face, a trait he’s clearly inherited from his dad.

Jungkook’s rather aggressive throat-clearing reminds you that you’re indeed not alone. Your petty ex is standing right there, looking as irritated as he’s been all day.

“Let’s do some stretches, then we’ll get on the boards,” he says, trying to mask his annoyance but clearly fails.

You and Yoongi drag yourselves up, lining up in front of Jungkook like school kids, who’s about to demonstrate some stretch when, in the distance, someone calls out Jungkook’s nickname—one you’ve found increasingly odd now.

“C!”

There’s a beautiful woman running towards him waving energetically, the same woman you saw in pictures with him on social media.

“Hara!” Jungkook doesn’t hesitate to scoop her up when she’s near, lifting her off the ground as they giggle together.

You’d never admit it, but the sight makes you feel physically sick. You’d rather gouge your eyes out than watch this scene unfold ever again. At least you’ve made Jungkook believe you’re with Yoongi—otherwise, you’re not sure how you’d survive the fresh stab to your heart.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were here?” she scolds him playfully, tapping his arm while he still holds her hands.

You can’t bear the sight of his eyes sparkling for someone else, so you turn to Yoongi, who’s raising an eyebrow at you, silently asking if you’re okay. There’s no need to respond. You both know the truth—you’re still not over your ex. But what could you have done? Begged him to take you back before he found someone else? No. That’s not who you are, and you wouldn’t have stopped him from living the life he clearly enjoys now.

But seeing him today, seeing how hurt he is just by the sight of you—or rather, you with someone else—makes you uneasy. Especially when Hara is being overly affectionate with him.

“Oh, how rude of me. I’m Hara.” She turns to you, extending her delicate hand. You briefly consider ignoring her, but you decide to be the bigger person. Unlike Jungkook, who’s been cold all day, you take off your glove and shake her hand, introducing yourself politely. Take that, Jungkook.

She moves on to Yoongi, and after he introduces himself, her face lights up like a kid at Christmas.

“Oh my God! I’m such a fan! You’re, like, the best producer ever!” she gushes, and it takes every ounce of your willpower not to burst out laughing at the sour expression on Jungkook’s face.

You: 2, Jungkook: 0.

“Really?” you ask with a mischievous grin, keen to twist the knife further. “Oppa, you should definitely sign something for her, don’t you think?”

Yoongi shoots you a look that could kill, but he simply smiles, his eyes betraying all the curses he’s silently aiming at you. “Of course.”

Still clutching Yoongi’s hand like it’s a lifeline, Hara turns her head back to Jungkook. “Oh my God! Did you hear that, C?”

“I heard,” Jungkook replies through gritted teeth. “Why are you out here in the cold, by the way?”

“Oh, right. I came to tell you that Namjoon’s arranged lunch at Tae’s.”

“That’s nice of him,” you sing sweetly, unable to resist adding a little extra honey to your voice. Everyone else gets your praise, everyone but Jungkook. Maybe you’re just as petty as he is, but you’re not backing down now, especially not when you can see his patience fraying by the second, his eyes dark with annoyance. A reaction is a reaction at this point.

“Oh, and before I forget,” Hara continues, turning and clinging to Jungkook’s arm and batting her eyelashes at him, “can you pretty, pretty please come to Jin’s tonight and tomorrow? We need help getting everything ready for the party in two days.”

It’s odd seeing Jungkook so easily swayed by her, the kind of behaviour you never thought he’d entertain. But maybe he’s changed, or maybe you never knew him as well as you thought.

“Sure, anything for you.”

Yep, you’re definitely going to throw up in the snow.

“What party?” Yoongi pipes up, earning himself a mental kick from you. There’s no way you’re attending a party where Jungkook will be.

“An early Christmas party! You’re both invited, of course. From what I’ve heard from Jimin and Namjoon, you two fit right in with everyone here,” she giggles.

For once, you and Jungkook seem to be on the same page, as he starts, “I’m sure they’ve got better—”

But for what feels like the hundredth time today, Yoongi interrupts, “No, we’d love to come. Thanks for inviting us.”

That crazy smile Jungkook had earlier is now plastered across your face as you look at Yoongi. Despite the silent argument raging between you two, you can’t help but trust him. Whatever plan he’s concocting, you have no idea, but you’re sure he’ll fill you in when you’re back at the hostel, alone.

For now, though, you trust him, because what else can you do?

"Let’s head to Tae’s then."

“With the boards?” you ask dumbly, because there’s no way you’re carrying your board across town.

“No, just leave it here and see what happens.” Jungkook smiles, a grin that instantly vanishes when Hara punches his chest.

“What’s with you? Be kind.”

“Sorry, noona.”

Ooh. So he’s with an older woman. Who’d have thought? It shouldn’t get under your skin this much, but it’s been a crap day, hell, even some crap years, and there’s nothing you can do to undo every thrilling experience you wish you hadn’t gone through because of him.

“I’ll help,” Yoongi mutters, grabbing not just his snowboard but yours too. If there’s one thing you could do to repay him for this gesture, it’d be to name him the sole recipient in your will. Not that you’ve got much to leave behind, but the thought counts, right?

You hadn’t expected ‘Tae’s’ to be a cabin on the slopes nearby, nor did you think it’d be a luxurious home rather than a restaurant. As you approach the door, you’re impressed—there’s no sign of it being some kind of inn as Hara rings the bell.

It doesn’t take long for someone to open the door, wearing nothing but some slacks and an open bathrobe, showing off his tanned, chiselled chest.

“C!”

“Tae!”

The two men pull each other into a bear hug, patting each other’s backs like they’re trying to knock the wind out of each other. Male friendships—you’ll never get them, and honestly, you’re glad you were born a woman with every violent tap.

When they part and Tae gives Hara a few friendly kisses on the cheek, you notice she’s just as comfortable with him as she is with Jungkook. Odd.

Then Tae turns to greet you and Yoongi. His eyes widen when he spots Yoongi, and a huge, boxy smile spreads across his face, so wide it looks like his face might split.

“Hyung!”

“Taehyung,” Yoongi replies, sounding strangled as he gets crushed in the taller man’s arms.

You’re torn between being amused by the visible disgust on Yoongi’s face as he’s squashed against Taehyung’s bare chest or offended that Yoongi never mentioned he knows someone who lives here.

“Please let me go.”

“Sorry, hyung, it’s been ages! How are you?”

“Good.”

“Ah, I’m doing well too, hyung, I’ve missed you.”

“I can tell.”

It’s amusing how Jungkook and Hara are a bit thrown off by Yoongi’s coldness, but as far as you can tell, both you and Taehyung know it’s just Yoongi being his little ray of sunshine. He’s genuinely happy to see Taehyung again, even if he doesn’t show it openly.

“And who’s this Miss Universe you’ve brought along? Are you on your honeymoon?”

You don’t have a chance to answer when Taehyung turns to you, because frankly, his intense gaze and barely-dressed body in the cold are a bit overwhelming. It’s kind of bizarre that he’s standing there in the open, half-naked, while the rest of you are bundled up for the weather. You force yourself not to check if his nipples are hard and instead stretch out your hand politely.

“That’s ___.” Yoongi’s voice is heard.

But Taehyung ignores your outstretched hand and steps forward, pulling you into an embrace and kissing your cheek, completely throwing your composure out the window.

“Are you two dating?”

You glance at Yoongi over Taehyung’s shoulder, both of you equally unsure how to answer. Yes, you’re pretending, but outright lying is something neither of you is comfortable with.

“We’re—” you start to say, dragging it out, but thankfully, for reasons you can’t quite grasp, Jungkook grabs Taehyung’s shoulder, pulling him away from you and cutting in. For once, you’re grateful for Jungkook’s stupidity.

“Let’s get inside. You’ll catch a cold.”

“Yes, right! Come in, come in.”

Entering Taehyung’s place is nothing short of wild. The grand open space is filled with dubious art pieces, the kind where you’d rather not know the price tag.

It doesn’t take long to kick off your snowboard boots and gear, leaving you in your base layers. Despite the warmth inside, the sudden shift in layers makes you shiver slightly, especially since there’s nothing in your stomach to keep you warm.

Following Taehyung further inside, you let your eyes wander, and you can’t help but stop when you spot the massive dining table, looking more like something out of a castle. It’s not the Korean BBQ on it that catches your attention but rather the chairs lined up around it. They’re shiny black. Not so unusual, except for the fact that they’re shaped like the backside of a person—naked, at that.

Yoongi, absolutely unfazed, just grins and gives you a light shove on the lower back to keep you moving.

“I hope you’re hungry. I brought plenty, so don’t feel like you’ve got to be all posh and eat like a bird.”

Rounding the table, you sit down beside Yoongi, while Hara joins Taehyung on the other side of the table. Why Jungkook chose to sit next to you, when there are thousands of other free chairs, is a mystery you’re not eager to unravel. Especially when you shoot him an irritated look as he sits down, and he just smiles like it’s the most normal thing in the world—as if the two of you weren’t split ages ago.

Not wanting to dwell too long on that and because you’re intestines are eating you alive at this point, you turn to your host.

“Thanks for having us, Taehyung. I’m starving after being tortured all morning.”

Everyone laughs at your comment—except Jungkook, who tries to nudge your ribs with his elbow, but you dodge, still somehow familiar with his antics.

“I didn’t torture you.”

“You did,” Yoongi mutters, boldly reaching for the meat to throw on the table grill, which has been sizzling away since you sat down.

“C always tortures people, nothing new,” Hara remarks, and Jungkook looks more betrayed than the day you broke up with him.

“You’re mean, noona.”

“‘You’re mean, noona,’” you mock him, cringing at yourself even as the words come out. It disgusts you how petty you’re being, and you recoil from it inwardly. The others don’t seem to share your sentiment, laughing at Jungkook being moody.

“Oppa, how do you know Taehyung?”

“Please, just call me Tae.”

“You remember the paintings in my studio? He’s the artist.” Yoongi answers you casually, though you can sense how much it bothers him being called oppa.

“No way! That’s so cool!” You gush, letting your eyes drift to the artwork hung on the walls as Yoongi adds food to your plate, much to Jungkook’s annoyance, which he makes clear with a side-eye.

“Aww, it’s not much.”

“Shut up, you’re amazing,” Hara scolds Tae, and you can’t help but think that, under other circumstances, you’d probably want to be friends with her. She seems funny and genuinely nice, which just makes it suck more the longer you dwell on it.

“I’ve been looking for a painting to hang above my bed for ages, but I can never find the right one,” you mention, trying to steer the conversation as far away from Jungkook as possible.

“If something catches your eye, you’re free to have it, ___.”

“Really?!”

“Don’t spoil her; she doesn’t deserve it,” Yoongi jokes, and you know he’s kidding with the way his eyes flit to you.

“Wow,” Jungkook mutters under his breath, but before you can respond, Taehyung cuts in.

“Why? What did she do?”

Oh no. Yoongi wouldn’t… but of course, he does.

“Little Miss Adrenaline here has been dragging me to most of her adventures since I got back from the States.”

“That’s not true. It’s only been a few,” you try to save face, but it’s hopeless with Yoongi being both your closest ally and worst enemy.

“So bungee jumping, kite surfing, and now snowboarding isn’t ‘most’?”

“No! I’ve done plenty without you, stop lying.”

“But it was enough.”

“They’re bickering like an old married couple,” Hara laughs, clearly torn between which of you to watch.

“It’s not enough—you’ve left me on my own more times than I can count!”

“At least I was there when you whined beforehand and came back all fuzzy after.”

“How noble of you.”

“You don’t seem like the thrill-seeker type, no offence,” Taehyung adds when Yoongi doesn’t come back with a retort.

“Well, sometimes you’ve got to step out of your comfort zone.”

“Yeah! Look at you, trying snowboarding all bold and brave! Kind of like all the things you said you weren’t into when we were dating.”

The table falls into a deathly silence. Jungkook’s words ring out in the open space, echoing painfully in your heart and being. You’re stunned, utterly speechless at his outburst—it’s so unlike the Jungkook you knew. You don’t know what to say, and thankfully, Yoongi spares you the need.

“Want some more meat?”

“Yes, thank you.” Your voice is quiet, too low to betray the trembling in it, but you’re sure everyone feels the hurt radiating from you. You don’t want to feel like a kicked puppy, but somehow, because Jungkook still means so much to you, it stings deeply.

The conversation between the others resumes, though you and Jungkook remain silent for the rest of the meal, though you reckon he doesn’t regret anything.

You learn that Hara is the same age as Yoongi, and that Taehyung is a bit older than Jungkook—though only by two years.

Even though you haven’t recovered from Jungkook’s jab just yet, you start to enjoy the food, feeling more energised than you did this morning. Jungkook, however, is still steeped in his pettiness, especially when Yoongi helps you tear a perilla leaf off the stack.

It shouldn’t be a big deal, but the constant negative energy from Jungkook is draining you to the point where you’re not sure you’ll even make it back outside for the snowboarding session.

Luckily, neither Yoongi nor Jungkook seem to mind dragging the day out here at Taehyung’s place. Hours pass, and after Tae makes you his special smoothie for your ‘sure-to-be-sore muscles,’ and Hara spills all the gossip you never knew you needed, it’s clear the snowboarding course is off for today.

While Tae and Hara clean up the kitchen, and Yoongi and Jungkook, to your surprise, get along enough to talk shop about music, you take the opportunity to admire Tae’s paintings, hoping to find one that fits what you’ve been searching for.

There are several abstract pieces, bold in colours and strokes, but they feel too chaotic, making you feel restless. You’re about to give up when your eyes land on a smaller piece above the fireplace, drawing you in immediately.

It’s beautiful—abstract as well, but with muted colours. You think you can make out flowers, or perhaps there are angels. You’re not sure, but the painting exudes a calm, controlled aura that you can’t tear yourself away from. Reading the title on the little card in the corner, you see “All of My Good is Yours.” It’s poetic, and it speaks to you on a deeper level.

“You like it?” Taehyung asks, stepping up beside you, hands in the pockets of his bathrobe. With his tousled hair and laid-back vibe, he looks every bit the artist.

“Yes, it’s lovely.”

“You want it?”

“I couldn’t possibly ask that of you.”

“Of course you can. I’d be happy to gift it to you.”

You smile softly, thanking him as you admire the painting once more, already picturing it above your bed.

“What’s the title about?” you ask, curious about the story behind the piece.

“C? Come over here real quick.”

You’re more than confused when Tae calls for Jungkook, not understanding the connection between him and this painting. You just hope the confusion isn’t written as plainly on your face as it is on Jungkook’s when he approaches you both, stopping just short between you and Tae.

“S’up?”

“What’s the title about?”

Jungkook’s eyes flicker nervously between you, the painting, and Taehyung. “Why are you asking?”

“I gifted her your painting,” Taehyung beams, completely unaware he’s just dug your grave and pushed you in.

The laugh that escapes Jungkook is anything but friendly, his eyes filled with what looks to close to hatred as they land on you.

“Of course,” he breathes, then eventually explains with a disdainful smirk, “it’s about a lover who knows he can’t live without the other.”

You’re shocked to the core. Was this painting meant for Hara, and it ended up at Tae’s by mistake? Or why would Jungkook paint something so meaningful in the first place? You can’t handle it after learning the meaning and that he painted it, even though it’s exactly what you’d envisioned.

You take the hit anyway and say, as neutrally as possible, “I guess I shouldn’t take it then. It feels too personal.”

“Why?” Jungkook scoffs. “It was supposed to be yours anyway.”

Jungkook turns around at that, leaving you gaping after him. It’s not just his mood swings but also his remarks that are giving you whiplash at this point, and seeing the equally shocked expression on Taehyung’s face, you reckon Jungkook isn’t usually this bitter.

“Well…”

“Well…” Taehyung echoes.

“Still want it?”

Do you? You’re not sure anymore, but maybe there’s enough time to figure out if you can look past it all and take it home.

“I’ll think about it.”

“Sure, just let me know, and I’ll pack it up for you.”

“Thanks, Tae. You’re too kind.”

“No worries.” He smiles as he walks back with you to where the others are lounging on his massive couch.

You don’t even have the chance to sit before Yoongi stands up and nudges you back to your feet. “We’re leaving.”

“What? Why?”

“I want a nap.”

“What about the course?” Jungkook chimes in.

“Tomorrow, mate. Today’s done.”

You’re grateful Yoongi made the decision for you because you wouldn’t have been able to say no to either Jungkook’s company or the course itself, even though both aren’t exactly the healthy pastime. But looking outside, with the late afternoon light fading, going back to the slopes doesn’t seem as inviting as it did earlier.

“Aight,” Jungkook says, clapping his hands on his thighs as he stands up too, completely unfazed by your puzzled expression.

“Wait, we need to get our stuff from Hope’s,” you call after Yoongi, who’s already slipping into his boots.

“I’ll call him and let him know you’re coming tomorrow,” Taehyung offers.

You’re not sure if it’s rude of you to leave it like that, but you thank him anyway, hoping it won’t be a big deal.

Everyone’s getting dressed in seconds, and once again, you’re struggling with your boots while everyone else watches. You try not to let the embarrassment show, but there’s no stopping the blush. Even when you throw pleading glances at Yoongi, he doesn’t offer any help.

“Let me help.”

Jungkook being the one to help is something you never expected after how the day has gone, but you’re grateful nonetheless. He bends down, and like Hope earlier, he takes the boot and your calf in his hands.

It’s nostalgic, him touching you, helping you when you’re the damsel in distress, and it makes you think about how different things would’ve been if you’d stayed by his side. You’re not sure how to feel—sad or angry. But who should you be angry at? Him? For moving on? Or yourself? Or maybe at Yoongi, for not stepping up like a cousin should in moments like this?

“Thank you, Kook.” You hadn’t meant for the nickname to slip, hadn’t wanted to see Jungkook’s starry eyes locked onto yours as though you’ve broken his heart all over again. But what’s done is done, and there’s no taking it back now. Not even the nickname.

“Thanks for having us, Tae.” Yoongi gives him a quick dab, and after Jungkook does the same, and you say your goodbyes, you leave with Hara.

You try to stay close to Yoongi, avoiding the other two. You don’t even have the energy to scold him for not helping you earlier. And while you walk silently towards the hostel, Hara takes a different route to wherever she’s staying.

You don’t ask, and you definitely don’t watch as she kisses Jungkook’s cheek as if they won’t see each other later at Jin’s. It’s different from how she kissed Taehyung, and you’re pretty sure even if they’re not officially dating, they’re at least sleeping together. The thought stings though.

It doesn’t take long for you to reach Namjoon’s hostel, Jungkook, maybe for old time’s sake, opens the door for you to step in first, and when the door chime rings, you both glance up at the same time. There’s none of the old playfulness in his gaze, just a sadness you wish you’d never seen. You reckon it’s all just old feelings resurfacing—thoughts of the good times, ignoring all the things that went wrong.

“Hey! You’re back!” Namjoon calls from behind the reception desk, flipping through some books as the three of you stomp inside with your snow-covered boots. Just hours ago you thought his smile and laugh would be your weak spot, only to fade into insignificance after Jungkook’s presence. “How was it?”

“I’m still alive,” you and Yoongi mutter in unison, bringing a small smile to your lips. It’s not much, but it’s all you can muster right now.

“Told you C would take good care of you both.” Namjoon laughs while Jungkook shrugs off his jacket. He’s probably too warm already, like he always is.

“Your luggage is—”

“In our room, thanks, Namjoon.” You hope he catches the hint as you give him a crazed look, willing him to stop talking.

“Right, in your room.”

To his credit, Namjoon’s clearly confused, and he’s got every right to be, but he plays along, which is exactly what you need right now.

“I’m taking a nap. Bye.”

“Bye!” You wave at Namjoon, following Yoongi in a desperate bid to escape spending another minute with Jungkook. It feels rude, the way you’ve treated Namjoon, but you hope he’ll brush it off as exhaustion.

You just want a bath and then to crash, even though it’s still early evening. It doesn’t matter that Yoongi’s snoring will probably keep you up; as long as you don’t have to face Jungkook again today, that’s all that matters. Especially when you see him entering the room across from yours as you close the door to the honeymoon suite, knowing that he’ll be off to be with Hara any minute.

masterlist • 02

a/n 3: lmk what you think in any way you like! 👀

Like what you read? Check out my other work here!

taglist: @leah-rose03

915 notes · View notes

mandy-asimp · 20 days ago

Text

Curiosity

sugar mommy lilia calderu x reader

warnings: cursing, some gay shit, smut, kissing mwah mwah mwah, age-gap (kinda unspecified, reader is like 26) uhhh that's it??

summary: your an inspiring actress who tends to have late rehearsals. and having no car, you had resorted to a the train. but then one night you meet a mysterious woman who captures your curiosity instantly.

Special thanks to @yourbasicqueerie for the car details and ideas🙏🙏

Your headphones rested on your head as you waited. You watched the snow fall against the tracks, it was supposed to get worse as the night went on. A white Thanksgiving was expected for New York. It honestly made you a little giddy as you hadn't experience good snow since you were seven.

Even as the thought of being alone for the holidays passed, you consider everything you could still do for yourself. Thanksgiving you could still cook, maybe have a Friendsgiving or open door thing in your complex building. Your neighbors always enjoyed when you had an open door dinner. But for Christmas, you knew everyone would be with family and their friends, leaving you to the comfort of your own home.

The sound of wheels screeching against metal drew you back to reality, your train was here. You had finished another show and could finally rest for a while before having to find something else to pay your bills. You had been searching through company after company, your manager helping the best she could to get you something solid and beneficial for both of you. All you've been coming across are small off-broadway shows and musicals, it wasn't much but it kept you content and cozy.

You flipped your phone over, seeing the screen light up and the time read 3:33 in the morning and you could only sigh as you boarded the train. You took in the few other people who had gotten on with you.

Two teenage boys sat giggling with each other and were finishing up some street food they had found. You assumed they were brothers with how well they got along. The sight warmed your heart. Then there was the woman with red hair. She had her hood up and nodding along to whatever song she must've been listening to. You caught a glimpse of her green eyes. She seemed young and alone. Then there was a tall man sitting way on the other side. His glasses rested neatly on top of his brief case.

The train had began and for at least fifteen minutes you had a smooth ride till the first stop. Not bothering to look up at whoever walked on. All you had known was they sat across from you, which you didn't think was entirely weird but there was an entire car open so why there?

You minded your business as the train began again. You occupied yourself for the ride by sketching and humming just slightly to yourself. And maybe you hadn't really been paying attention to what you were sketching, but as the train came to another stop you had an entire drawing of what you had taken in earlier. Your head tilted as you stared at it.

"It's a good sketch." The voice across from you had spoke, calling for your eyes to leave the paper. And by golly, did your heart leap off an airplane and go skydiving. The older woman was absolutely stunning. Her salt and pepper curls were pulled up yet the perfect amount framed her face. Drawing your attention to the big brown eyes that stared at you with interest and curiosity. Her outfit, you couldn't tell much of it as it was covered up by a black winter coat, but her bag screamed expensive and so did the few pieces of jewelry. "I never even saw you look up once to relook at anyone."

"I have a really good memory...I guess.." You were feeling shy under her gaze. It wasn't unlike you though, you naturally were a soft spoken, well-mannered young woman. You didn't like to be loud, which was surprising to many people you worked with when they had made a joke about you needing subtitles. But then again, that's what everyone else knew you as. There's always two sides.

The woman's silence made you think at first she didn't hear you, and you were ready to just smile and look back down to your papers and start on something new. "But to transfer that so easily onto a page isn't as easy. It's a talent..what you posses."

You couldn't help the smile and confused look you gave her, "posses? Like it's a superpower?" You lightly giggled. The woman had followed along, liking your humor.

"No..more like magic." Something in her eyes changed as they finally took you in. Your vintage racer jacket that covered a sweatshirt with a casual pair of jeans. Your feet covered in boots that looked to be worn to the bone as she just barely caught a glimpse of the gray baggy socks that covered the top. You must be wearing some big socks. "What are you doing this late on a train anyways?"

You hummed before answering, "I'm an actress. I just finished a show and now I'm heading home for the night. I'm hoping for something big next, really make my name."

She saw the twinkle as you spoke about your career. She so easily knew that you were following a dream. She admired that. "And what is your name, baby?" She leaned on her elegantly crossed legs, getting closer to your space.

You blushed and smiled with your eyes closed as you tucked into yourself a bit, having a physical reaction to her pet name. And you had muttered out your name, knowing she didn't hear it as she laughed. Was she laughing at you or with you? "You're a cute one, but I didn't catch that. What'd you say?" She asked again, leaving out the pet name since she truly did want to know your name.

You took a deep breath and giggled once more, finally getting her your name and she repeated it back to you. Softly like it was going to break if she said it any louder. It was said again in a way you've only experienced few times, low and dragged out. Almost moaned under her breath. It made your smile fall to a subtle grin and your blush deepen. You wanted to hear it again, and again, louder, shouted, begged, you had to shake your head of the thoughts and the woman seemed to know what had just occurred.

She stood from her spot as the train came to a halt, "get home safe, baby. You got star potential and it would be ashame if the world never got to see it." She winked before walking away. She had left you so stunned you never even got her name.

All you knew was she was going to plague your dreams for the next week and torture your mind during your searching you had to do. You had named her the train mommy in your diary, which she began to appear more and more as the days drew on. You hadn't stopped thinking of her. You couldn't. But alas, you chalked your dreams up to just that, dreams. You'd probably never see such a woman again anyways.

Right?

obviously wrong.

You had hit December now. The worst one in years, and you were cutting it close with this one. A musical that was supposed to show the weekend right before the big holiday. A rehearsal had gone late, you had really been working on harmonies for a song. You just couldn't help to feed the directors need to run it till it was perfect. The breaks in-between being subtle talking sessions on how to get there tonight before adding in the choreograph.

Back at the train station, you held yourself tight as the snow came down faster tonight. You were praying to make it before they shut down the train due to weather and leave you stranded. Your foot tapped as you stood behind the yellow line waiting for the thing to just finally arrive.

You glanced around the platform. Almost nobody was there, the only other people was a couple. One was with long brown waves that were kept down by purple ear muffs and a matching scarf wrapped around her. Her black coat zipped up as her hands were stuffed in her pockets. she swayed with the other as they laughed with each other. The sound just barely reached your ears. The other was wearing a green beanie and had the hood of her coat pulled over. Her eyes fixed to the other and laughing along with her. Her breath showing in the air as she, you assumed, had sighed at the others shenanigans but leaned in for a kiss anyways.

You pried your eyes away from the romantic moment and began a pointless search on every app of your phone. Only looking back up when the train had stopped infant of you. And you knew then, once settled in your seat, you weren't making it home. It was just you in the car.

You took a deep breath and leaned back as the doors closed. Playing music from your phone as you bobbed your head along with it. Just you in your own train car with your own thoughts. You had shut your eyes as you relaxed.

The next time they had opened was to the car attendant looking at you with an apologetic look. "Our train has been ordered to stop service as the snow picks up, it's getting bad out there."

You gave a soft nod and sat up and blinking away the last of the sleep. You didn't mean to fall asleep, but you knew you weren't even making it home, it was just a matter of how close you could get. You reached for your bag and began to get yourself situated.

"Enjoy your nap, sleeping beauty?" That voice. You couldn't contain the smile as you snapped your head up. Pink dusting your cheeks as you gave her a nod and kept silent. "Do you have anywhere to stay for the night? That storm has canceled every flight, train, and bus out of here." You frowned and shook your head, realizing the situation you were in now. "You're a quiet one tonight, baby. Are you okay?" She stood in front of you now, invading your space and holding your face from being able to tuck itself away. But as you stared up at her with all this adoration, her stare back was of pure concern.

"I'm resting my voice. We overworked them today in rehearsal and our show is the weekend right before Christmas." You quietly explained, sending her a reassuring smile up. To that she gave a knowing nod and smiled again.

"Well then I guess you won't have the voice to argue me, you'll come with me. I'll make sure you're all nice and warm tonight." She reached for your hand, grabbing it and pulling you along with her.

From the train station, all the way back to a parking garage. Her hand never left yours, you had figured it was so she didn't loose you in the snow. She brought you to an older looking car. It was a Porsche, you figured that out by the logo, but that and that it was old was all you knew. It must've been expensive. You thought it fit her well, maybe you could ask her about it more in the morning. You slowed as you watched her walk closer and come into view with it for you. Yet, she didn't make it to the car as you tugged her back.

You realized then you were taller than her and even as she looked up at you, it felt demanding. You had her close to your own body, whispering "your name?"

When she said it, your ears warmed even just at how beautiful it was. You mouthed it back with a delicate smile and gave her a slight nod, telling her to continue on.

You didn't understand how this woman had made you trust her so easily. If anyone else tried to drag you to their vintage car, you would've fought back and found the closest hotel to stay in. But instead, you were accepting her offer without even thinking twice. I mean...if it came to it, you would stand a chance...or at least you want to assume you would be able to.

She drove so carefully through the snow, seeing as it was almost impossible to see five feet ahead of you. It seemed like her driving was memory though as she turned through the roads and managed out the city and to a neighborhood on the outskirts. The house she pulled into was large, something you'd never be able to afford obviously. She let the cold in as she rolled down the window to put in the code for her gate.

The outside however wasn't as exciting as the inside. It was decorated so precisely, but what you really noticed was the different crystals scattered around the areas you could see. Another thing was a tarot deck in almost every room. You grew curious and tapped her hand with your laced fingers. When she looked, you pointed at the deck that sat perfectly in the middle of the coffee table.

"Everyone's got their own thing. I have a collection of decks, all hand painted over time. They hold more power and connection...I like to believe." Lilia shortly explained. She enjoyed the curiosity in your silent words, even nonverbal you could translate such emotions. She'd love to get to know all your emotions and how well you could tell them, but as you yawned, she remembered the time and situation. "Let's get you settled in, huh?" You sleepily agreed with her, following her once again upstairs.

Waking up you were surrounded by comfort. Your body could actually stretch out even more than in your own. There was no one else in the room with you in the grand bedroom as you sat up and rubbed away the remaining sleep in your eyes. Finally being able to glance at the clock and seeing it was almost twelve, and you were thankful for having a rest day from the director.

You sighed and went back to observing the room. A door to a closet sat in the furthest corner, you wondered how big it was inside. A dresser in front of the bed with a reasonably sized tv that was still off and only showing you your own distorted reflection. A few more pieces of furniture were scattered about, but the room was clean and tidied. Giving you only so much about the woman who brought you here.

Where was she anyways?

Finally tossing the cover over, you slipped out the bed. Being in nothing but a baggy t-shirt and your socks still. Maybe you had changed and were just too tired to even remember the detail...but you would've been able to recall just the tiny action of it.

Your feet carried you down the wooden steps as you kept pondering how you had changed. Too lost in thought to even notice the few prying eyes from the front room as you went the other way to find the kitchen. "Lilia?" You softly called out, knowing that it probably did nothing with how quiet it came out. You were growing desperate for some tea.

A hand fell to your lower back as the woman had appeared. "Well look who isn't dead in my bed," she was to quick to tease you and watch you blush. "Can I get you anything to eat or drink, hun?"

You spelt tea on her arm and followed her like a lost puppy into the kitchen. Smiling as the room's personality shouted at you as you sat at the round dining table. Your eyes were so eager to take in anything that you could to learn about the woman. The kitchen was cozy and cluttered a bit, but you could tell some good ass meals got cooked in here on several occasions. There were even still crystals littering about the place, which you deemed a house trait.

"How did you sleep?" She had turned from the kettle, bringing you over a steaming cup of water and a few flowers on top. "Chamomile for your throat, wouldn't want to ruin that pretty voice. I have to go finish up a meeting, but you just stay here and then we can talk more ok?" She cupped your cheek, brushing her thumb over the warm apple of your cheeks. You smiled and nodded, letting her get back to it as you sat and drank the tea and kept taking in the decorations.

Unfortunately though, the distant voices shouted for your attention and you couldn't stop the growing curiosity as you snuck to hide behind a little corner. You had just caught the end of Lilia's sigh, "who knows how the New Years party is to go. With how this weather is, I don't know if it's honest such a good idea. I can't let everyone sleepover." She joked, and it brought a smile to your lips at the idea of the woman's house being filled with people sleeping everywhere.

"But you've never let the weather stop you before? Either people will show or they'll deem the weather too bad. A little snow hasn't hurt anyone!" The woman's voice was beyond cheerful. "I think, you should send out the invites anyways and just play by ear."

There were murmurs of agreement, only then did you pick out the two other voices. There were three woman sitting with Lilia. One's laugh stood out to you a bit more, "you could bring your little play thing even. Dress her up as a little server for the night."

Lilia scoffed, "the trains stopped running and she needed somewhere to stay. It was three in the morning and I just happened to have been there. Once the trains are back up, I bet she'll be off to her own life." Her tone was dismissive as her words. "Poor thing would've been freezing outside if it wasn't for me."

"Alright, whatever you claim Calderu. We're on our way out then. Send out the invites for the fun of it. You never know what the weather will do." Another began to make their exit.

You muted the conversation as you sat and thought over the woman's words. Her play thing? You obviously knew what they really were implying and it made you blush profusely at the idea of it. It was absurd, for sure....you had to shake away the opposing and very distracting thoughts.

The sound of her laugh bringing you to quickly come through, staring up at the woman with wide eyes. Even when caught eavesdropping, you still gawked with curiosity. "Listening to my conversations, baby?" She offered you a hand up, which you accept and rose to your knees first.

As your eyes turned to make sure you set the mug down on a stable surface, you missed Lilia's shift as she smirked at the position she had you in. It went right back to her caring smile though when you looked back to her, standing the rest of the way. You had concluded with being two inches taller than her, not much, but there was a clear difference.

"I was curious," you didn't try to lie about it as you grabbed your mug again. You enjoyed how the warm ceramic felt against your palms. "You're hosting a party?"

She squinted her eyes at you before leading the way into the living room. She sat on one side and you sat facing her. Your legs pulled up to your chest, waiting for the story. "Usually I do, it's a big company party. I rent out some big space and everyone gets all dressed up and celebrates the new year."

"But?" You pried for more information. This woman sounded like she lived a life of luxury and you wanted to know as much as you could.

"But with the weather I don't know how well it'll work out. They're saying it's supposed to be calm for a few more days and then right before new years it'll all come down at once." She repeated the forecast for you.

You bit at the inside of your cheek, clearly thinking of what to say to convince her. "Well, if I was invited to some big company gala..I'd find a hotel nearby as standby. Assuming I have the funds for that. What are they like?"

Lilia let the many gala's fill her head. "Each one the same, you mingle with people you've seen around, and then the ones you've worked with. A few other partner companies show up. It's dancing and drinking all night, but they all end the same. Getting in a taxi and going home to the quietness of your own home." She described it, knowing you could paint the picture yourself. "Last year we had it at the museum, met many new people. But by midnight I was ready for bed and reading a chapter from a book."

You sighed dreamily, "I don't think I would ever get tired of that then....What is it-"

"That's not important, but you say that now till you've been doing them for years. And you look no older than eighteen." She jabbed at you, watching as you pouted. "Oh, I'm sorry, nineteen."

You made an offended face, "I'll have you know I'm almost twenty-six." You corrected, taking a big sip of your tea. "I am far from the teens." You sassed slightly. "Maybe not as far as you," you teased quietly.

She caught it however, and honestly you should've known she would've. Her mouth agape, "how dare you!" It was dramatic and adorable to you. The amount of control she had of her features to play into her emotion amazed you. No...it captured you and held your curiosity hostage, refusing to let you go for just one moment in her presence. Even as she pulled her head backwards and the expanse of her neck was on full display for you. You wondered what it would look like covered in your kisses.

Your heart began to beat faster at the images.

Lilia was staring at you and she was speaking. She was speaking and you watched her lips move with each word and yet you couldn't hear any of it. You frowned as her brows furrowed and her eyes filled with a faux concern. "Oh baby...that look in your eyes....you can't help your curiosity can you?" Her words finally got through to you.

"It's a curse..." You sounded dazed out just as much as you looked it. But once the moment fell to silence you began to see through to reality. It was brief, but you realized you hardly knew this woman and by the second time you're already in her house and longing to hear her call you baby again.

Get a grip and get going.

It was a mantra that played in your head as you began to do just that. You gasped and began looking all over. "I...my phone. I should probably see if someone can come get me." You blinked a few times as well before unfolding your legs and getting up.

Not even giving it a second thought as your sock clad feet pattered up the stairs and rushed into the room you left from this morning. Your clothes were folded on the chair in the corner. Your bag next to the chair and boots tucked under. Your rushed and crouched next to it, rummaging through everything and finding it in your coats pocket.

A few notifications from the other night, friends questioning if you made it ok. Then there were the missed calls from them, a collection of worried text. Your eyes jumped from them all up to the time. It was past ten and your fingers moved as you sat on the floor responding to people.

You didn't notice how much time passed as you became engrossed in your phone and catching up. The device began to ring as Jen began to call. You answered and raised it to your ear, lying back onto the soft carpet and spreading out on it.

"My god we all thought you died!" She exclaimed right away. "Did you make it home? What happened?!"

Your giggle answered first, "do you remember that woman from the train I mentioned to you?" You pulled your bottom lip between your teeth.

"You were practically drooling just by the thought of her."

"Well, she just so happened to be there and she took me back to her home and I stayed there. But I need you to tell me this is crazy. Earlier, she was with friends and they and I quote go 'you can even bring your new plaything'."

"Oh my- girl did you accidentally stumble upon a sugar mommy or something? You literally manifested that shit!"

"No, Jen...I hardly know the woman."

"But you could! Think of all the things this could do. You could be smart with your money too. Move closer to Broadway with us."

"I like my apartment! Yeah it's a little far, but it's self manageable. Plus, I highly doubt she would actually be into that. And we have a show to focus on."

"Oh my god! Seriously if you skip another chance I'm going to beat the shit out of you! Why are you so unfocused on your love life?"

"Because you're my best friend and will only feed into my delusions so I have to be the sane one that listens to you go on and on about Alice." You rolled onto your stomach and began kicking your feet. "But she is hot. God and she keeps calling me 'baby'."

"She so wants you."

"I think I should get going though...call Dottie or something."

"Oh no hun, she said she had something with her kids and my best bet is she is still not available. Sooo in retrospective you are stranded with a really hot lady who could possibly or possibly not be a sugar mommy waiting for someone to come along."

"Jen...I just don't think it's the right time. I want to make a name before I settle down."

"You know, if you do that then how will you be able to tell they're not with you for just the money and fame? Also you're not settling down, just exploring."

"Saying I'm not likable?"

"No you are every ounce of likable, it's what almost makes you unlikable. But I just think that this is the perfect setup and you should take the advantages that are clearly laid in front of you. You yourself said you needed some extra help financially so here's your help."

" I don't know...I don't think she deserves to be taken advantage of."

A beat of silence from her. "I love you and all, but you might just be the dumbest person I've talked to all day and I've been surrounded by idiots."

"Ouch."

"She literally, if you openly asked her flat out, would you be my sugar mommy, I put money she'd say yes! You so have to!"

"No! Even though she's the most striking woman I have ever met and she has such a look. You should've heard her earlier, I mean I wish I had instead of becoming curious about her skin. She makes me beyond curious."

"You're a freak when curious."

"Earlier...we were sitting on the couch and she rolled her head back and I just couldn't stop thinking of kissing her neck."

"Did you know, you actually have been mentioning slightly how badly you want to fuck that woman ever since you told me about her? You don't remember the night right after show ended you came over, we got drunk, you told me in great detail?"

"I could've given you more."

"You are such a lie to what people know."

"What because I'm a human and have natural attraction?"

"Because you're an absolute menace!"

"I tell you I want a mysterious woman I met on a train that has bewitched me with her alluringness to tie me down and then some once or twice and now suddenly I'm a menace?"

"You want me to tie you down?" Lilia's voice carried into the bedroom. Your eyes finding her leaning against the door frame with a surprised smile.

"I will take grave details when we see each other again. This has to be an in person debrief. Love you. Have fun." The line went dead as you lowered the phone down from your ear.

Your cheeks were on fire as you stared with wide eyes. Your throat was tight and your breathing was ragged. There was no way she actually heard you. You blinked rapidly and shook your head. "No! That- I- how long were you there?"

She began to walk in the room, and you don't know what possessed you but you were crawling to meet her in the middle. And it did something to her. It made something shift and click into place when she looked at you again. Her hand coming to your cheek. "Oh baby, long enough and I must say I only caught half that conversation but it sounds like we should talk. Don't you think?"

You dumbly nodded and scrambled to follow her onto the bed. You sat at a reasonable distance, not too far to ruin any chance, but not close enough to seem easy and desperate (even if you were). You stared at her as she slowly crouched onto the comforter. She moved so elegantly compared to your loose movements.

"What did you and your little friend talk about?" She began so quickly. Not even trying to explain first, wanting to know what you knew now and you had told her. You told her everything with no hesitation. Mentioning Jen's theory that Lilia was a sugar mommy.

"People will talk." You flat out said. Your decision was already made since the first train encounter. But you wanted some fight for it to not go through, needing a bigger sign to reassure yourself.

"Talk is cheap." Lilia responded. Her eyes were searching all over you. Drinking you in like she was the most dehydrated plant in the dessert. "What is it that you want?"

You wanted to get to know her more. You wanted to know what adventures she could take you on. You wanted to know how she tasted, how she kissed, how she used those hands. You wanted to know if it would be forever or just temporarily. You wanted to know her deepest secrets and her to know yours. You wanted to know if you could love her.

"I don't know...maybe this is something to be thought over?" You had countered your drumming heart. Its rhythm went from love struck sixteenth notes on a snare to a cello's symphony of sorrow.

What were you doing?

"Well why don't you get ready and I'll drive you home then?" She spoke only after a hesitating breath.

The rest of the time was quiet. You didn't know what to say anymore and honestly couldn't believe yourself. You knew you were tempted by this woman, you just couldn't risk anything yet. Not with everything you had going on with the show (is what you told yourself).

Even as more days went on and on, Lilia grew from a single thought into a plague of them. Anytime you weren't rehearsing or focusing in on something, it was her you thought of. People began noting your ever growing curiosity and distant looks as your focus would wander off so easily. Yet you never missed a beat so no one ever brought it up.

Except as opening night came, Jen could hear your curiosity and she knew you were no where near focused. "Ok, hey!" She snapped in front of your face, turning your chair to face her. "What the actual what is going on with you? Everyone has come to me asking about this dazed look you're always in. So what is it? I mean I actually already know what it is, so what happened?"

You blinked and sighed as your brows furrowed, you were back to reality and heard her question. "I think I'm ready to play by your advice."

Her eyes widened and a shocked smile slapped its way on her face. "Oh!... Oh! Actually?" She seemed in pure disbelief at the idea. "What did you do?"

"She asked me what I wanted. And yeah we all know the obvious answer, I'm a doomed hopeless romantic, but I told her I wanted to think it over." You were hearing yourself for the first time out loud since. "I can't help but to think I played the wrong move?"

"No! No! Now take this chance to make her practically need you. She's had you in and out of reality for the last few days and weeks. You should call her after the show, or text her." She advised.

"I don't have her number..." you sighed. Trying to conjure up any way to find her again. "The train. I'll take the train home and hope to find her."

"Are you sure you really want to take the train for this? The snow is rolling in quick and if you get stranded.." Jen jingled her keys slightly by her side.

You shook your head, "no really I don't mind the train rides at night. Usually there's like no one with me so I'm mostly safe." You rounded the corner to cross the stage out.

Both you and Jen had stopped at the sight of an Alice and someone else. "Oh! Matter of fact this is her!" Alice waved you over. You turned to Jen, mumbling a goodnight before joining the two. Feeling shy under the attention of the woman. "This is Lilia Calderu. She's an old friend and wanted to meet you. I have to go though, Jen's probably waiting out in the car already. Have a goodnight you two and you," she turned to you, "get home safe."

You tried not to cringe physically as the woman left you alone so quickly. It was silent until the sound of the backstage doors locking back. It was truly just the two of you now. "You're taking the train home? Even in this weather?"

"It's the only transportation I have at the moment. It's easier anyways." You spun your head to pass her briefly before looking into the empty crowd. "So you know Alice?"

"I worked with her mother a few times. Let me drive you home tonight." She didn't sound like she was asking you and you wanted to know how commanding she could be.

Your head turned and you finally looked at her. "Are you following me?" You don't know why that was the question that got out, but you didn't back down from it. Even when she laughed in your face.

"No, but I do think it's no coincidence this is the third time we've met. So let me drive you home tonight." She insisted again. Her big brown eyes silently pleaded for you to go with her and not the train again.

"I'm out of your way, that's too much inconvenience." You denied with a shake of your head.

She sighed and grabbed your hand. Ignoring your questions and dragging you with her out. You could see the car finally in the dim back lights. Your eyes examined the exterior. "You have a nice car," you stood behind her as she opened the passenger door.

The interior was contrasting to the dark black that coated the outside. It was light and crème with a darker brown accenting it. You began to really process how old the car was when you noted the lack of center console. This wasn't a car you ate in while gossiping. The seats were close, almost one long bench, and you wondered how close you would actually be.

"It's a 1973 Porsche. It was in a car show and I thought it would be a nice one to own." She stepped aside for you to get in. Humming in content as you had finished fighting her. You watched as she went around the front and slide in on her side.

Your answer was you were dangerously close. You could smell her perfume radiating from her and she smelt like luxury flowers. Subtle and strong. "How much did you pay for it?" Your eyes kept taking in every detail.

"The real question is what everyone else couldn't pay for it. Those childish men didn't know when to stop." She shook her head at the memory of the day she got the car.

The way she brushed it off to be nothing made your heart beat find its way between your legs. She spoke like it was hardly a dent in her bank. That it was a rigged game almost. That nobody else was going to be beat her for this car from the very start.

"Are you a witch?" The question was out before you noticed and her eyes snapped to you. They were boring through you and it made you feel drunk. Her attention alone made you feel drunk. And as the feeling grew, you found yourself in a fit of giggles.

Lilia took advantage in the moment and really watched the smile reach your eyes. To see you in a natural state with no knowledge of it. "Now why would you ask me that?" She laughed back her answer.

You raised a finger to your lips, "it's a secret now." Your cheeks were the cutest shade of pink she'd ever seen and she couldn't contain herself anymore.

In the back alley of a small theater, Lilia Calderu let the intrusive thoughts win.

While still in your fit of giggles, you missed how she began to shift around and then suddenly was above you while your back dug against the car door. A predatory smirk graced her lips right before they fell to your neck. You gasped at the first soft kiss, giggles instantly subsiding. Nothing was funny as her lips danced around your neck, searching for the most sensitive point.

When's he found it, she added a little more force. Earning a throaty moan that never made it past your lips. Then she bared her teeth and, grazing the spot before latching on and sucking. "Lilia!" You gasped and a hand naturally flew to her pulled up curls.

"Is it because I've bewitched you? Is that why you ask?" Her tongue ran over the bite marks and pressed a kiss over it. "That's what you said to your friend is it not?"

You hummed under her, "so you are a witch?" You tried to sound somewhat grounded, but with her having you like this, biting all over your neck, you only ended up gasping.

"Do you wanna see what magic these hands can do?" She whispered against your ear before grazing the shell of your ear. "Would you like that baby?"

You giggled deeply, "fuck yes. What are you gonna do to me?" Your eyes began to darken with curiosity as your body kept rising to meet her warm body.

She agonizingly slow found her way back into her seat. Eyeing for you to sit up yourself and get comfortable. "You have a curious imagination, what wondering can you do to find your answer?" She began to pull out. The snow flakes began to grace the earth with their frosty presences.

You felt hot in the car though. Lilia's right hand rested on your thigh and lightly was scratching it. The action made you groan quietly and realize how long this car ride was actually about to be. "That'd be telling you all my fantasies." You had finally answered her question. "Have you thought of things...you'd want to do?"

You felt young and dumb at her wise chuckle. "Oh you have no idea the things I've imagined. And I'll make you an offer you can't resist." She began to shift her focus between the road and you. Pleased with how big your eyes were. You really couldn't help yourself and she was already loving how expressive you were. She knew you were silently asking her what.

That was the night your arrangement had fallen into place. By the end of that weekend you had an agreement signed. She would keep you financially stable, you'd never have to worry about any expense ever again. She didn't care for your protest against not being able to pay for anything, which then led to you swindling it down to any living expense. Any luxury would be your own money. Even though she would give you an allowance every three weeks of three thousand. You got financial stability and free money. Although, you weren't too sure what Lilia got out of it. You were expecting it to be sex in return, that's how most of these things happened. But she didn't right away, she would work you up with just those hands and a few questions that implied many things, but were so simple you never knew. She was keeping you curious and you didn't even realize it.

It was the evening of New Year's Eve and you had been spending a lot of your free time glued to Lilia. She didn't even ask you to, you just found yourself craving to be next to her when she's not working (which you quickly found out you just wanted to always be by her). She had joked that you should just begin to move in. She was sitting in her study with a notebook on the table and she was writing something, you sat under the desk, your legs folded neatly next to you.

You had been in the arrangement for a basically two weeks and still lacked to know what it was she did. Even as you sat on the floor with your head in her lap as her non-dominant hand twisted your hair around her fingers, she didn't tell you. "We should start getting ready soon for the party..."

Sleepily, your head lifted from its spot and bumped against her hand that blocked the sharp wooden edge. Last time you hit it (two days ago) you had sat still on the ground and cried briefly in her lap as she ran a soothing thumb over the spot. "Are we getting ready together?" You got out within a yawn. Crawling away from under and into the open space to fully stand and stretch. You looked back over your shoulder.

"I'm afraid not baby, otherwise we'd never get ready on time." She rose from her seat and gave you almost an apologetic look to your subtle frown.

You gave an understanding nod before slipping off to your room. Lilia had gone through with the party and wanted you as her plus one. But as you had stood in nothing but a black bra and matching panties, you had remembered no theme.

You shook your head and without much thought wrapped the short silk robe around you loosely and ran across the hall. Giving her big door a knock before prying open the piece of wood and poking your head around first. The room was silent as you moved further in, "Lilia?" You called into the master bedroom.

She came around from the bathroom, "yes baby?" She answered before her eyes found you.

You both had done a sweep over the other. Her eyes focusing on the amount of leg you were showing while yours focused on her chest being held up nicely by her bra. Your cheeks burned when you noticed how long you had been silent and staring.

"I...the theme.." you raised the issue you faced. You began to assume it was something more classy as she wore black flowy formal pants. You wondered what they would look like with your cum smeared on them. Your legs crossed as you couldn't stop looking at the piece of clothing.

"It's all black classy half indoors and half outside. But if you're going to wear a skirt or dress, I want you to put tights underneath. Understood?" She gave you that look and you stiffly agreed before rushing back out.

You had no idea what she was wearing but the pants alone did things to you. You were eager to match her. Although, all you owned was clubbing material from college. Which meant everything is shorter than what'd you buy now. You started simple with the tights, thankful for fleece lining. Along with the heels Lilia had gifted you as a welcome gift. They were Red Bottoms, you promised her to take the best care of them since you knew they costed a pretty penny (even if she reassured you it was nothing).

Shimming into the tights, you kept searching over your outfits. A strapless mini black dress grabbed your attention. Its neck line was a trusting heart that held your girls up even without your bra, which was indeed removed as you hated how the material could be seen. You were content with it but you instantly had to address the lack of accessories.

You had a small jewelry box with you, it was one of those things you always carried with you when you knew you were spending a few nights away from home. There were a few silver pieces, you grabbed out three and slid them onto your left wrist. As your fingers searched through the fake silver rings, you began to smile. You loved decorating your hands with rings.

The last things were your makeup and hair, which took longer than you expected but you looked good. And once you had fluffed your hair and did it how you do, you were feeling good. You had been staring at yourself in the mirror when she knocked. "Come in," you softly granted. Watching through the mirror as Lilia came in.

Your breath caught when she had fully came in. Lilia leaned against the wall in the same black pants and a black buttoned up shirt that was left a few buttons undone. The tarot card necklace she always wears drawing your eyes and lazily pulling them down to her cleavage. "That's what you're wearing? Won't you be cold?" She pushed off the wall and sat on the edge of the bed. Her hands brought the shoes closer and then snapped for your obedience.

"I don't think so, I plan to wear a coat over." You stood in front of her and raised a foot up to her while stabilizing yourself with her shoulder.

"Which coat?" She had slipped the shoe on and began fastening it, "too tight?"

Your hair shook, "uh-uh and I have this really dramatic furry black one. I'm pretty sure it's fake fur but I thrifted it a while ago. It's great for pretending I have money." You switched feet on the tap at your ankle.

"Mm, people will know it's fake." She was more smooth with the second shoe, now having a note of how tight you liked your heels. "Let me see if I have anything lying about." She tapped your ankle again before standing up, still having to look up even in her own heels. Leaning forward and planting her red painted lips to your collar bone, leaving her signature as she moved out.

That night you had never once wiped away the mark as you drank and mingled about the high class. Yet as the night kept dragging closer to midnight, everyone seemed to get more and more drunk.

You were everyone.

You had found Lilia and snuck up on her from behind. Arms draping over her shoulder and then hugging around her as your head buried into her neck. Placing kisses all across it as she kept speaking with the group. Her own thumb rubbed back and forth on your forearm.

"The next one was pitched during august and is to be ready by summer. We're aiming to have it be the summer hit." Lilia was still composed and hardly tipsy. You were growing curious if she ever drank at all. "It's an absolute wonderful storyline and the music is so in tune with the characters."

"Well we can't wait to see it," a woman had hummed. Pleased to hear that there was something grand to look forward to. Her voice sounded familiar.

You pulled your head from hiding and stared at the woman. She wore a black floor length dress that fell off her shoulders, a broach right in the middle of the neck line. She was accompanied by another woman, she wore a suit with a dark green tie. Had she been further away you wouldn't have been able to tell it was green. Both had their eyes on you the moment you revealed yourself.

"And who's this, Calderu?" The one in the tie had raised her brow at you. She was attractive, but not like Lilia. She was a scary attractive, that she'd probably be into some freaky shit if you let her have her way. You didn't want that though, just Lilia.

You stood tall at the sound of your name coming from her mouth. A hand naturally sticking itself out to be shaken. "This is Agatha Harkness and Rio Vidal. One of Broadways biggest power couple."

"It's a pleasure to meet you both!" You hiccuped and felt them shake your hand. "I'm sorry it's not under sober circumstances, I truly am a huge fan and wish I met you before I did the shots with the guy from the circus musical over there. He's got a great voice honestly. Now, Lilia..it's almost midnight." You spoke the truth even if it was slurred.

"Ahh yes, ladies if you'll excuse me it's almost midnight." She bowed her head before letting you pull her through the crowd. It was beyond her how you could manage to slip perfectly through and find a secluded balcony. It had a small loveseat that you wondered how it would feel to bask in the summer sun here.

You wasted no time sitting down and sighing. Your eyes closed as the blackness spun quickly. "Lilia...I drank too much fancy things." You frowned.

Your anchor back to reality was Lilia in your lap attacking your neck with her teasing lips. "That'll happen when you do shots of dark after only drinking champagne with me." You heard the vibrations in her voice and groaned as you pictured her smirk. "You got something to say, baby?"

Your head nodded sluggishly but stilled to look her in the eyes geneuinly. You enjoyed seeing her from your angle. "You look very mommy tonight." You so simply said. "Very classy."

She made a silent 'oh' with her mouth turning right into that cunning smirk. "You really think? I figured you were wearing a dress and the heels-"

"I love my heels!" You so suddenly were on a new topic, your hands squeezing her hips subconsciously and missing the muffled moan. "Oh Lilia they were an amazing gift, and honestly you deserve to get ate out for them." You were such a drunken mess.

Lilia's eyes darkened and she stooped to be by your ear. Her warm breath heating your body from the cold that started to nip at you. "Is that a promise baby?" She left a ghostly kiss behind your ear. Her burning stare only fueled your own fire.

Your mind, in poor attempt, pieced what her moans could sound like. What your name would sound like with you buried between her legs. You wanted to know how she tasted.

"Focus baby." She demanded and it silenced all your thoughts immediately. "Good." She purred. "Sometimes I truly do wonder how long you could think for."

"Forever... if you'd like." You didn't even double think it and it was the most sober thing you had said.

Lilia was appreciative of the dim lighting and your intoxicated state so you wouldn't be able to see how deep of a blush painted her cheeks. Something about how you pulled yourself from not even being coherent in compliments to not missing a single beat for her made her body buzz.

Nothing more was said as the surrounding world began to count from ten. But by one, your lips were pressing desperately into Lilia's and trying to savor how her lips felt. Your hands held her hips tightly as hers held your cheeks. You were stretching up into her, etching the feeling your body was going through into every corner of your mind. You weren't oblivious to how she never kissed you on the lips.

Yes, your arrangement had only been going for a week or so, but you couldn't help to think about what she's getting from the whole thing. Fireworks exploded around you and muted the heavy pants that were leaving you. It was just you, your ever growing curiosity, and her. But every question you had wanted to drunkenly asked, the ones you recited so you wouldn't forget, seemed to be lost and you asked her nothing. You were too busy kissing her after all. Too busy feeling her body rumble with a need you've never encountered before.

You pulled back slowly from her and hummed constantly, your eyes were dark and wide as you stared straight up to her. A smile so soft Lilia swore you could wrap a baby in it and they'd fall asleep in an instant. "Happy new years Lilia." You leaned back to peck her cheek.

She repeated it back to you and stood, offering you a helping hand. You took it and she tugged you a bit closer. "You're not to drink anymore, understood?" She kept it low, just between the two of you.

Unfortunately for you though, you were definelty planning on drinking after that kiss. Too many emotions had risen and you didn't feel like thinking them tonight. But you weren't going to lie to her and make the promise you weren't. "I can't promise that I'll stop but I can promise I won't be a hassle even drunker." You raised a pinky between you, ignoring her intense gaze and staring at the lone finger.

Although you wish you took her advice and stopped. These people knew how to party long, the last time you heard murmurs of was one something. You had done a few more shots and now you just felt icky and drunk with no sign of Lilia anywhere.

"You lost, bunny?" A deep voice wrapped around you. The owner dragged a hand around your waist and came to stand in front of you. It was Agatha with Rio coming from the crowd to stand next to her. They stared at you hungrily. "Bet you drank too much didn't you?"

You frowned and nodded. A pathetic whine escaping your lips when they stepped closer to you. You were feeling trapped. "Have you see. Lilia?" You managed, eyes only catching blobs of people.

"She left a while ago, said something about needing to finish up work?" Rio looked around the room herself, signaling to her wife that the woman in question was no where to be seen. "Was she your ride?" Her hand caught your chin to make you look at her. A sinister grin pulling her lips.

You huffed and broke from the grasp, continuing to search the blobs. "She was supposed to be...she wouldn't have left me." You began to walk away, only being pulled back into their web.

"Why don't we take you home, hmm?" Agatha had raised the offer. The couple had talked, and you were their main topic. "I bet we could give you something better than-"

"Lilia!" You cheered as the shorter woman had appeared from the mess of people. You were too busy rushing to her and hiding yourself behind her and in her neck to acknowledge her deathly glare. Breathing her in deeply and giggling. "They said you left and it made me wonder!"

"You can tell me all about it in the car, m'kay?" She brushed your arms before focusing to the other women. "Ladies, I don't know if I have to remind you again, but she's off limits for your games."

Agatha scoffed her laughter, "why? Cause she's too busy playing yours?" She raised a challenging brow. That's where you knew her voice from, she was the one who called you Lilia's play thing.

It's was an intense stare off that was bound to go on if it weren't for you. You had wanted to know more of this possessive side but sober. What would she say to you if she found a hickey from someone else? How would she react? Should she remind you of the agreement? Your hands moved from her shoulders and lazily fell to her waist. You were hugging her more now and humming against her skin.

She let your lips find her ear and then you whispered, "mm I wanna go home Lil'." You sighed out. Your body slightly slumping against her and that's when you remembered you were in heels. Your foot began to lift its self to be freed from the beautiful torture.

"If you'll excuse us. Have a good night." She gave them one last glare right before turning her attention all to you.

Lilia led you for most of the night. Even as you had started stumbling through your night routine. Her hands held you stable and she laughed along with most of your drunk rambling.

You were on about something you did within the night as you stepped into the room. Catching glimpse of you in the mirror, still in the dress and tights that you were dying to get out of. "Mm, can you get the zipper?" You asked while already stripping out your tights. She had appeared behind you with a caring, tired grin of her own. You could hear the tension grow with the sound of the zipper falling.

The dress folded over and pooled at your hips first. Revealing your bare chest as you focused on getting out the fabric. Once you were you stood in nothing but your underwear.

"Baby?" Her voice was deep and raspy. You hummed out your acknowledgement. "Have you been flaunting around all night like this?"

"The dress wasn't going to look good with a bra and I was really wanting to match with you. Especially after I saw the pants you were wearing." Your eyes fluttered lightly as you thought of those pants and blew out.

Now would be the perfect moment. You were practically naked and standing waiting for her next words. Even as her hands slid to your waist, you stayed still and waited for her. "And what about my pants?"

You bit your lip as thoughts filled your eyes. They didn't stop short with details, taunting you yourself and making your body heat up. Lilia was enjoying watching the full body reaction to your own ideas. How she felt you warm up and how your breathing became irregular. Your eyes had fluttered shut as her hands moved further across your body. "Look at me, baby." Your eyes snapped open. She chuckled at how blown your pupils were. "I adore that look in your eyes."

"Lilia..."

Maybe it was the way you whined for her. The way you looked for her in a crowd even when drunk. She hardly had you, and yet she had almost all of you without even realizing. All she knew was you were hers and hers alone, and it drove something in her.

She left from behind you and began to rearrange briefly. Pulling the chair from the corner to be in front of the full body mirror. Lilia took her seat and spread her legs wide, staring through the mirror at you. "What about my pants, baby?" She asked the question again.

Your legs pressed together as you spun to face her. Shivering as her eyes raked over you and darkened even more. She beckoned you forward with a single finger then pointed at the ground. She was demanding you to your knees and you seemed to have no objections as you fell infront of her. One of her wised hands grabbed a fistful of your hair, first pushing you against her own thigh and seeing how you started to fall dazed. Then she lifted your head back and leaned closer.

"I bet...if I pulled these off," her fingers were in the waistband of your black panties. "That you'd be sticking to them without a doubt. Would I be right?" But you didn't have to answer as she went to get her own answer.

Lilia was right. Your faced flushed once you saw how ruined the garment around your thighs. You didn't realize how curious you had been throughout the entire night. You had managed them off the rest of the way yourself, placing them into the expecting hand.

"So, does this curiosity of yours-"

"Mmm," you hummed your protest against the question. Quickly hiding your face into her hip as you really didn't want to crack into that all tonight. Not even drunk you could get through all that embarrassment so soon.

Lilia understood anyways, running her nails dance along your scalp. "Maybe we can discuss it sometime over dinner, hmm? How would that sound?" You gave her another hum, this one being open to many interpretations. There was silence and it was peaceful enough for you to begin to drift in and out. "Why don't...we save this for when you're ready?"

Your head bobbed against her and that's when you swayed backwards. The first thing you did was gaze up to her, "sleep with me tonight..." you used her thighs to help yourself up, giving them a soft squeeze.

There was no space for argument as you began to get yourself ready for bed. Slipping into a big shirt you had managed from a drawer, you grabbed another and handed it aimlessly out. Honestly you weren't too sure if Lilia had grabbed it or you dropped it, but all you saw was a grand bed calling your name. You wanted to know all about the bed.

The arrangement was coming up to its first month and there were still many things you were yet to touch on. The main one still being what Lilia was getting from this whole deal.

You had pushed through her front door and sighed at the emptiness of the inside. Lilia was gone on some business trip, for what business, you seemed to keep yourself in the dark by never even looking her up. You wanted her to tell you instead.

She was supposed to be back tonight, having texted you earlier to be at her house when she got home. There wasn't much else given, you couldn't figure out her tone, her emotion, nothing. The text was so stale you were in the dark on what to do. But what you did do was pickup some take out to bring over on your way. It resided in the fridge for now.

You sat on the couch, you had made yourself cozy as you just waited. What 'cozy' came with though were a few shots of whatever was in her stash. Curious to know what this was about, but also nervous because you didn't know what this was about.

And eventually the locks began to undo and the front door revealed the woman of your desires. A tall man behind her dropping all her baggage by the door and sharing a mumbled conversation with her before leaving. The door was locked again and the house began to warm with the owner back in it.

You slid off the couch and right to her, standing proud in her gaze. The furrow in between her brow had ceased to exist as she took you in being. You stood in a white long sleeve that was just teasing being see through with little navy blue underwear, a white little bow at the waist band. Your hair was free and you had a never ending amount of adoration radiating from your stare.

"Hello, baby." She began. Her simple name for you had you practically melting already to be in her space. She came closer and smiled softly up to you. Her hands already knowing their place around your waist as she brought herself into you and began to slowly kiss up your neck.

Her teeth grazed the side muscle and you sighed. "Hi Lilia..was your trip good?" She groaned into you and tightened her grip on you. Her teeth lightly clamped to you. "Not good I assume? What..." you attempted, but stopped at the harsher bite delivered to your skin.

"You know you could always look it up." She answered the unasked question. You shivered at her tongue soothing over her bite marks. "Or is it the curiosity that you get off on?"

A hand flew to the pulled up curls, burying itself near her roots. "Lilia..." you whined in attempt to get off the situation.

"I wonder if you think of all the different jobs I could have, do you?" Lilia's voice was daring as her hands were adventurous on your body. She had you in her web and you were caught and never wanted to leave. Your head nodded vigorously as her thumbs brushed under your boobs. "Or is it deeper than that? You get too curious and begin to think of the things that could happen? Maybe you think of me bending you against an office desk and making only my name the only thing you know?"

You sighed as your imagination and curiosity teamed up and fed you with the very idea. You thought of how she would hold that promise if you knew what she did. That if she had a desk you were determined to be fucked over it. You whined again for her.

Lilia detached herself from you, "how'd you find out about it anyways? Your curiosity. Got too curious one day and started feeling a tingle?" She was staring, expecting an answer to her questions but you just started short circuiting. You began stuttering instead, making her chuckle and shake her head.

She walked past you and into the kitchen. Grabbing the wine glass before freezing and noting the moved bottles and empty wine glass. You stood still, watching her point slightly at the bottle. Immediately you were caught. "You've been drinking baby?"

"I got nervous," your voice was meek and barely audible. You were quick to pull out your doe eyes and come closer to her at the beckoning of her single finger.

"Do you know how hard you make this?" Lilia raised after a second of taking you in. She was talking about the stares you give her as you stood there in a fitted gray long sleeve that just covered over the hem of the matching shorts. But she knew if you raised your arms up just enough, she'd see your midsection.

"I'm not doing anything though?" You were quiet in her presence tonight.

Lilia smiled at that, "oblivious to your own beauty, baby. Truly do you have a bad quality?" She leaned closer to you. A careful hand stroking your cheek. "Let me into your thoughts, what's going on up there?"

You quickly tried to gather a reasonable answer, "what am I making hard?" Was the first thing you managed, shifting closer to her.

The older woman inhaled," this arrangement."

"I wanted to asked you about that." Was quick out your mouth as you climbed over to the couch. She came over as well, wine glass in hand and you found yourself next to her almost in her lap. "I'm confused about what you get from it. I get money...but you haven't asked me for anything really. You give a few kisses to my neck here and there but that's it. You'll talk a little deeper and tease me, but that's it. So what is it that you are getting from our arrangement?"

She threw back the rest of her glass, getting up to pour herself another. You realized she was avoiding your question and stalling. It was in her distant look that clarified it. There was something she wanted but she wasn't asking you for it.

So you waited till she came back and straddled her lap, giving her no choice but to meet your gaze. "Lilia...what can I give you?" You were dying to find out how to return anything.

Her hands caressed your hips, causing them to roll forwards on their own. "I want to know why your curiosity is always so strong." She charted the waters that you've tried to steer away from. You bit the inside of your cheek, debating if the answer was really worth pleasing her. It was an embarrassing story.

"When I was a kid, ten and below, it was genuine curiosity. I just wanted to know what everything in the world was. Then in middle school kids started to figure out what somethings are, and curiosity is a signature trait when growing. It started simple, very vanilla, but then....there's a lot of kinky shit people are into. And being curious it never stopped. But that's not how it really started, it started sometime in high school." You started to relive the days in your mind as you gave her a story. You told it as you saw it and you could tell you were giving her details you would've never told anyone else. Even if it made you flustered and you had to will your body not to move under her hold.

By the end of it, you had a few beads of sweat decorating your forehead and your cheeks were burning red. You didn't even want to think of how wet you must be standing here. You were taking shallow breathes and your throat felt dry. Your vision finally came from your memories to the present. Meeting those brown eyes you found yourself drowning in recently. "And that's why my curiosity is a curse."

Lilia stared for a second. She must've been trying to gather her thoughts of the history of your curse. You, however, weren't expecting her first response to be a bruising hold to your hips as her eyes closed and she took in a big breath. It made you worry if it was too much and she was now uncomfortable or if it wasn't the answer she wanted.

"Is that it? Does that make this over?" You quietly yet quickly asked. Tears beginning to threaten your eyes. You weren't ready to loose her so soon.

She saw the switch in your emotions. To reassure you she gently grabbed your face and brought your forehead to hers. "No baby, it's not over." She whispered so softly to you. "When we made this agreement...I had set a goal to find out how far your curiosity could go, where it stemmed from. Especially when you look at me with those big eyes and furrowed brows."

Your glassy eyes blinked once or twice while leaning back. You were deciding on what you wanted to do from here. You kind of got an answer, even if it didn't explain her avoidance of really fucking you. You for a fact (maybe the most truest one of all) you wanted her to fuck you. Your body practically begged for her hands on the daily. Especially after telling her all about how you touched yourself in high school, your body was worked up and ready. "There's very few things that make me uncomfortable in bed...." your pupils were almost covering all the color in your eyes. "God, Lilia just fuck me. I can't- you have to now. Otherwise I'll have to finish-"

A harsh kiss was silencing you as you moaned into her lips. You were quick with getting rid of her glass before burying your hands all in the hair. You twisted and brought her down with you. The kiss grew messy, oh was it messy. When Lilia pulled away, a trail of saliva kept you both connected. "New years..." she began. Coming back in for another messy kiss, before breaking away to behind your ear. "I had you right there. On your knees..." her lips dropped to your pulse and sucked hard. "And do you know the sight I had the graces of seeing?"

You head shook back and forth, "uh-uh"

Her fingers were in your waistband and pulling your panties down once again. The strands of wetness went with before snapping coldly back against your bare pussy. "You're soaking baby."

"Only for you, Lil" you gasped as your hips rolled against nothing. Your heart was hammering against your ribs as her fingers ran up and collected your slick.

"I'm gonna have so much fun with you sweet thing." Her lips curled when she brought them to view. "The question is where to start."

Her head dipped back between your neck. You giggled out your moan, "your job...why won't you tell me?" You fiddled with the ponytail holder in her hair. You wanted her hair free and wild.

Her smirk against your skin made you heat even more. "Maybe I want to keep you guessing."

"Does it have something to do with mine and that's why?" Your hips jolted up at the featherlight touch that was given to your clit. Lilia's hot breath fanned over the saliva that covered the bruises.

"You gonna piece it together while I eat you out? Is that your plan?" She started moving lower on your body, flattering her tongue in your hardening nipple through the fabric of your shirt. Your body arched up to her. "But yes, my job does play with yours." Her mouth sucked through the fabric.

You struggled to piece together your next question. Her mouth felt heavenly but the shirt was killing you. You needed out of it and out fast. You sat up, Lilia following and knowingly pulled your top up and off.

"Baby do you ever wear a bra?" Her eyes didn't even have to look away from yours to know. "You wanted to tease me?"

Her questions only fuels your inquiry. Did you do it to tease her? To hope it would get her enough that she'd pounce on you? Did you dress for her? Have you been? "How much influence do you have with theater?"

Her head was on your other nipple, giving it the same attention. "Enough to make or break a career." Her voice was low as she released your boob with a crisp pop, pushing you back down with a single finger. "I've made many stars and destroyed many already."

Her touch ghosted over your sides. "Should I be worried about my future then?" Your breath hitched in your chest as her lips pressed right above your bundle of nerves. You were trying to piece together what she could be but with her on you it was harder than normal.

"No, I know how to keep work and personal separate. You have nothing to worry about." She was nestled between your legs now. You managed to pick your head up to see, the sight alone was almost enough to send you over. Lilia noticed it in your eyes as she bored hers up to you. "I want you to keep asking your questions, baby."

"What's your job tit- mmmh." Her tongue swiped through your slit and it was when you knew you were truly in for a challenge. Between a few pants and hums you managed to ask for her job title. She was casting spells on you with her tongue.

"You can't freak," She spoke against you and the vibrations made you let a noise from your chest up. You babbled your agreement, slowly lapsing yourself to the pleasure. "I'm CEO of the theater wing."

Your heart either skipped a beat from dropping into your stomach, or from dropping to your core. The power she really did have. She could easily bring you up to the top, or she could easily blackball you and take everything. "fuck me..." You exhaled and earned a laugh from below. The knot in your tummy tightened. "Would...would you ever ruin me?" Your hand flew to her curls as she picked up the pace and began to really dive in. The question was unanswered as your body began to convulse against the couch. Her name tumbling from your mouth in a careful cry.

Lilia leaned back onto her legs that were folded under her as she used her thumb to wipe off your juices from her chin and suck the finger clean. Never once taking her eyes off your disheveled body. Her eyes really raking over your bareness and twinkling at the marks she left behind. "I guess it depends what you mean." She had a cocky smirk on her face.

"In both ways. Would you?"

The brown eyes snapped up to you and you enjoyed how she let you see the mischief in her eyes. You knew she had a few thoughts run through her mind, "I would never ruin your career, but you...you sure you're okay with this?"

You laughed and sat up, crawling over her now and kissing her hungrily. "I wouldn't have let you eat me out if I wasn't. Are you okay with this still?"

"Yeah...I'm still good with this." Her hands squeezed over her bruises lightly and gave you a slower, more sensual kiss. Hers was brief, although you protested and chased her back. "Let's go upstairs baby, we're gonna need more space."

You beamed and agreed, helping her up and leading her to the bedroom you'd only slept in a few times. Your eagerness was shinning the moment that door closed for the night. "What things don't you like?" Her right hand pointed to the small bench at the foot of the bed, commanding you to sit there.

"Anal, piss kinks, anything that involves food. Oh and toe sucking, leave my feet alone all together actually!" You stalked her steps as she moved about the room and looked like she was reminding herself where everything was.

"And the things you like?" She asked and you heard the smile in her voice. Her answers however was you blushing and giggling sweetly to yourself. Lilia joined in when coming closer to you and standing right in front of you. Her hand holding your jaw just so you could look at her. "I don't give you permission to giggle."

It was like a switch had flipped in you. The noise had subsided almost instantly under her intense gaze. "I like a lot of things. I like hickies, one for the world to see but then the rest just for me. I like being bound, overstimulated, tickled, fucked dumb, anything really. If it makes me curious it's a bonus." You kept your list simple, it went on longer cause that's just the curious freak in you.

"Is there anything you want to try now?" She was giving you the chance to choose where this night was going. A chance to not embarrass yourself, but that's not what you wanted.

"You know what I really want? Like more than anything right now?" Your eyes enlarged right before her. Lilia gracefully shook her head. "I want you to let go. Stop holding back from me entirely. I want you, Lilia...I'm yours however you please."

You were playing a dangerous game with her now. Her lips latched to your pulse, more aggressive than usual as she bared her canine teeth and let them sink in just a little more. Listening to the mewl you let out as the pain made your body fill with pleasure. Her tongue soothed over it, then trailed away as she moved agonizingly slow down your body. She slipped from the bed after placing a kiss right below your belly button. Her eyes were dark and swarming with ideas while she stared your naked body down. You could tell when she landed on her first move.

Lilia had grabbed turned and sat on the bench at the foot of the bed, her back now towards you. "Crawl to me baby." Her voice was low and making your ears ring. You did just that, you went from the side of the bed around. Her fingertips hovered the curve of your back before you sat in front of her. "You're so willing to be treated this way?" She was checking in with you, the slight highlight of worry in her eyes.

"I told you I was very open...are you ok treating me this way? Is this what turns you on? Being in control?" And there was that curiosity again, it never left you and Lilia was realizing she should stop questing if it ever did.

She took a moment to consider, "I do enjoy seeing you on your knees for me." Her hand ran into your hair, and suddenly she was recreating new years. Pulling your head against her thigh. "And this..did you know you make it hard to work when you lay in my lap? I can feel your feather touch tracing patters just barely."

You licked your lips at the idea. Did it really work her up the way she worked you up? Your hand daringly began to trace patterns on the side of her thigh, eyes searching for the reaction in her face. Yet she challenged you and gave you nothing. "What else? What else?" Left your lips eagerly. You were bubbling with the need to know.

Lilia's lips curved into a nasty smirk as she conjured the rest of the night up, your promise stood out. "I've had a long business trip, baby. Im sure you could be of some assistance." She leaned back and was right there. The only thing in your way were her trousers. "Go on, put that pretty mouth to use."

Your bottom lip was pulled between your teeth as you were instantly at work to get rid of her pants. Giggling to yourself as her hips lifted up for you, your lips pressed to the soft skin that was already revealed. You heard her gasp at the feeling and it only spurred you on. Once they were off you threw them off into some corner, eyeing the wet patch on her underwear. You kissed your way up both thighs, leaving one right above the wet spot.

Your hands ran against the back of her legs, fingers pressing into her calves and massaging them. You wondered who was in this position before you. What they might've looked like and how they got here, and it surprisingly made your fingers twitch with jealousy. "Was there someone before me?" You whispered to the inside of her knee. This time, it was Lilia who hummed to get off topic. Except you didn't accept it and grazed your teeth against her. "Did you find them the way you did me?" You climbed closer, fingers tugging at the remaining barrier.

"Why does it matter?" She exhaled, she couldn't get anything else out once the cold air breezed over her. Lilia had groaned your name at the littering of kisses. Gasping when your tongue flattened against her.

"I want to know who I'll be putting to shame when I'm done with you." You didn't waste anytime and started lapping her up. Her moans echoed through the room. The lovely sound of her pleasure wrapped you up in pride. "Tell me." You growled, slowing your pace.

Lilia's chest raised in gasping breathes. Your name falling from her mouth in warning, but you didn't let up. "Fine...there was one other..whiles back...you're the first female baby."

You sped up again, the thought of putting men to shame always ignited something else in you. Knowing that you were doing better already just by sex. It wasn't long before Lilia was coming on your tongue, pushed into another orgasm as you couldn't get enough. She had to grab a strong fistful of your hair to get you to ease up.

When you looked up, you had to crash into her lips. Placing yourself in her lap, a hungry drive for more leading you to abuse all over her neck. "You do that to everyone you eat out?"

"uh-uh, you're a special someone." You were ready for another go. Your hot breath fanned over her entire neck. "Do you still need a second?"

"You want to go again? Twice wasn't enough for you?" She chuckled at your still wandering lips. They were near the shell of her ear, parting just a bit more to graze your teeth. Her breathing hitched at your own laughter.

"Until you have to tap out..." you purred as her hands slid over your hips. You loved how her touch felt and you would die in it if you could.

Her grip tightened, "why don't we focus on you for a bit, baby? It's my turn to be curious. Up, on the bed." She pushed you back and off. Motioning to the bed as she spun to her knees on the bench. Staring at you intently while you got situated in the feather pillows.

Lilia's skilled hands undid the buttons to her top without breaking the eye contact. She was left in just a bra, one you were hoping to get the honor of taking off. She proceeded to find home between your legs, pulling your body closer to her with a dark chuckle. It was like she had used magic to make the vibrator appear.

The buzzing sound had made you erupt into a fit off a mixture of gasping, begs, and giggles. The older woman was curious as to where this reaction came from. Your knuckles turned white from how tight you were gripping the sheets. "Lil'..." you giggled when she kissed your clit. "I should warn you."

You managed to perch yourself up enough to see her between your legs and you knew she saw you clench at nothing. "Warn me about what baby?"

Right as you opened your mouth she pressed the vibrator against you and watched you collapse against the bed. Already writhing under the sensation, getting worse when she added her tongue to you. "Mmm, fuck. Lilia...is this what you pictured?" You managed instead. You were right there, on the edge of the most earth shattering orgasm.

She hummed against your body, it mixing with the electric vibrations. "It's one of the many ways..." she's pictured you in other ways. What ways? How many ways? God was she really going to ruin you? Fuck you'd let her! You'd let her do anything! She looked so perfect between your legs already, how else would she look this way with you?

Your body convulsed as you screamed her name so loud you swore the neighbors heard. Even after she removed every sensation, your body kept twitching as you tried to catch your breath. You stared straight into the ceiling, swearing it was turning into the bright light.

"Well I'll be...you're a messy one baby." Lilia laughed as she stood up from the bench. Her chest was dripping with you and it was no secret you had squirted everywhere. "Is that what you were trying to warn me about? A vibrator too much for you?"

"They just wear me out quicker," you had finally steadied yourself. "You'll need to know that, trust me."

She laughed once more. "Noted, now why don't we take a nice bath and go enjoy that takeout you had in the fridge?"

"You never looked in the fridge tho?"

"Maybe I am a witch," she playfully winked at you, but the second look in her eye was begging you to accept it almost like she was.

You squinted for a second, shrugged, "I'm into it. A witch sugar mommy." Her peppered curls shook as she dragged you from the bed to the grand bathroom.

The rest of your night was history.

#reader insert #marvel #fanfic #x y/n #agatha all along #lilia calderu x reader #lilia calderu #patti lupone #wlw #sapphic #wlw smut #lilia calderu smut #sugar mommy calderu

313 notes · View notes

sigmasemen · 7 months ago

Text

WHEN YOU GO ON A DATE WITH THEM. (1/2)

multiple blue lock characters x reader

tags: romance, cute relationships, established relationships, fluff.

taglist: n/a currently

characters: alexis ness, akira endoji, ryusei shidou, nijiro nanase, ranze kurona, michael kaiser, bachira meguru, rin itoshi, chigiri hyoma.

word count: 2668

extra notes: i originally had sae in this but he didn’t make it into the 9 character count i usually do.

ALEXIS NESS:

- Ness is very strategic about dates and things of the sort. He always thinks about the best ways to make you feel special, how to plan things out for you to enjoy yourself, he's particular.

- Though he tends to stick to romantic dinners in a nice restaurant, private to just you and him, sometimes you suggest something a bit more daring. Like, "Let's go to a yoga class!" or "Let's head over to the local water park!"

- But, arguably, his favorite non-romantic-dinner-date is definitely when you two went out shopping. Not to a mall or anything, just a town square, traditionally built with intricate patterns in the rocks.

- Ness, at first, was just window shopping and letting you pick everything. Whenever you looked at something for a prolonged second, he grabs it, buys it, and gives it to you. Especially if it's matching.

- He's a bit touchy on dates. Mostly wrapping his hands around your waist, occasionally glaring at people who stare at you for too long then pressing a firm kiss onto your lips, face, wherever he can reach.

- Ness enjoys taking you to fancy wine and dine restaurants, though gets confused if you order something more normal. He always gets you extra food just in case. (On most dates though, he's cooking for you.)

- At the end of the date, he walks you home and has his usual V-shaped smile plastered on his face while he waits for you to tell him bye. He then leans down, presses a kiss on your hand, then trails kisses up to your cheek and smiles.

- "I will see you soon, my love." He then walks off, leaving you dazed (with, of course, a soft smile on your face.)

AKIRA ENDOJI:

- Akira blushes bright red whenever you do literally anything slightly cute on the date. If you give a small giggle, he'll grip the table with a huge grin and bright blush on his face.

- He holds open every door for you, pulls out your chair, adjusts your outfit when people are looking. He'll do anything for you and your praise.

- He loves his first date with you. He remembers you went to a garden, and as he was chasing you around in there, he somehow stumbled into the fountain. He looked sad that he had ruined his appearance, so you jumped in right with him.

- He adores going on as many dates as he possibly can with you. You're practically going on one every other day.

- Akira, whenever you're going up an elevator or doing something before a ride, will bounce on his heels and smile as he's excited.

- Each date is extremely eventful though. You cannot say you've ever had a bland one. Whether the idea is skydiving or Akira just accidentally does something dumb, it's a 50/50 chance.

- One time, you went to a zoo and stepped on a bug. You didn't really care, however your (lovely) boyfriend's arms and legs were wrapped tightly around you as he stared at the guts of it. Then proceeded to act cool until he saw another one.

- He enjoys when you touch the tuff of orange hair in front of others because he practically chirps like a bird.

- Always buys souvenirs after every. Single. Date.

- He also loves going on coffee or hot chocolate dates in the winter because you always shiver and he gets to give you his coat. He's very proud of himself after that.

- At the end of each eventful date, you lean on his shoulder while listening to music with him. He fools with your hand until you both fall asleep.

RYUSEI SHIDOU:

- Oh expect the most eventful dates to the point your legs are trembling after from running around with him.

- He adores to pamper you and give you all his attention on dates. And grab your ass. Also a very important part.

- Most dates include going to parks and beating kids on the jungle gym, going to a carnival and competing to see who's better (if he wins, he gives you the stuffed animal regardless), going to rave concerts, or staying home and fucking. Whatever he wants that day.

- He actually took you to see A Clockwork Orange. You didn't understand what he saw in it, especially considering the foulness of it... However, he explained how he fucking loved the gore. Weird, but you had learned to accept it after seeing that kick to the face Rin got...

- Shidou adores randomly slapping your ass on dates and making you yell. He finds it hilarious and will press kisses all over your face as a thank you for letting him.

- He sometimes invites you on sudden notice to feed strays with him, which then spirals into a long and loving date.

- You teach him how to slow dance. He does it to impress you, but beyond that he'd suck.

- Always asking you to wear revealing outfits but accepts it when you don't. He enjoys how you gawk at his muscles when he flexes though.

- He also finds it fun to take you to cat cafes and to place all the cats on you, then take a picture and run.

- He buys you a lot of small trinkets, especially clips and plushies. He even gets a custom plush of him to put on your phone. (He has one of you on his too.)

- All dates end back at his place after a few rounds, having you curled up against his chest. For once, even though he feels empty as usual, he enjoys the sight of you on his chest. His breath and your face made you both drift to sleep.

NANASE NIJIRO:

- Nanase is over the moon when you ask him out on a date. He's a bit scared to ask you out on dates but he appreciates when you ask him. The only time he ever asked you to take him out on a date was when he asked you to prom. (His mother was dolling him all up while he looked a bit embarrassed.)

- Most dates have you two holding hands or interlocked arms.

- Also getting dirty.

- Nanase sometimes takes you on remote dates to picnics so you can remain distant from everyone as it's nice to have just your company around.

- He loves dates where you two get to go on adventures together to try new things. Like rock climbing! (You found out he had a fear of heights with that.)

- A few times on your dates, he'd say a metaphor wrong to a snow cone vendor and you'd just giggle and kiss his cheek.

- He's very much a gentleman and will hold open doors for you constantly.

- Tried to slow dance with you when it was getting dark and it was raining, except he slipped and you both fell. It took a while for you to stop laughing.

- Usually you buy large drinks early on in the date to quench your thirst for the entire date.

- Whenever the date ends, you walk him home and shake hands with whatever parent is there at the time. You then wave and walk home. (He's texting you the entire way home to make sure you get home safely.)

RANZE KURONA:

- He practically rushes to ask you out as he doesn't want any other guy to come sweep you up and take you away.

- Dates usually are random, he'll go anywhere you want to go. The aquarium is the main spot. Not because he picked it, but because you did. You'll stare at the sharks for a few prolonged moments, then look at you and trail your fingers along his teeth.

- You always wear lipstick to your dates so you can press a kiss onto his cheek.

- He usually dresses pretty casual for dates. Shorts and a tank top. You always go all out and it's cute to see your contrasting styles.

- Sometimes you'll bring a Nintendo switch and show games to him that he enjoys.

- Most dates are actually at either of your houses as you two like having alone time together. Sitting in bed together, sharing his jacket as you lean against his shoulder and keenly watch the movie you had put on.

- He enjoys playing music in the background when you two do work out dates. By the end, Kurona is still going while you're face first on the ground.

- Kurona hates going to restaurants and instead picks up fast food for you two. He's always trying new things at places. Though he especially likes snowcones from a certain corner store.

- Dates ends with silent walks late at night, content with each other's company and nothing more. Though, not much more is needed for you to be satisfied.

MICHAEL KAISER:

- Oh how he loves to spoil you rotten and pamper you. He sometimes runs his hands down your back and tells you how good you look. Asks you to wear outfits he specifically buys for you.

- He constantly takes you slow dancing and tells you that he has to show you off to the town. You're used to a lot of attention but it's even worse when Kaiser is flaunting you. Kisses you for the paparazzi.

- He pampers you a lot. Mostly dates on the town where he can show you off. Or he takes you in a helicopter and flies you around, taking you across buildings sight seeing.

- He loves how the cities reflect in your eyes and will randomly kiss you because of it.

- Always takes you to big, nice musicals and plays after renting out the entire theatre. He enjoys comparing you and his relationship to one of the relationships in the show.

- He adores feeding you German cuisine, says he made it but he most definitely did not.

- Most dates are very formal, however he doesn't mind any sort of date with you. He adores the look you get in your face after you've been pampered silly.

- You have at least 50 different pieces of jewelry encrusted with a blue diamond or sapphire that he bought for you.

- Kaiser sometimes randomly reaches around your waist and presses firm kisses onto your neck, mumbling how beautiful your body looks in the outfit you have on. He just chuckles when you get embarrassed.

- All dates end with him dropping you off at home in some extra way, then telling your parents how great you were. He always has to make a grand gesture towards them as well.

#bllk #bllk x you #blue lock #x reader #alexis ness #alexis ness x reader #akira endoji #shidou ryusei #shidou ryusei x reader #nanase nijiro x reader #nanase nijiro #kurona ranze #kurona ranze x reader #michael kaiser #michael kaiser x reader #cupid’s bangers

398 notes · View notes

astrogre · 1 year ago

Text

What gifts to buy for each Venus sign

Christmas is among us, my favourite season and time of the year. Venus is the planet of love, by nature it can display what we like to receive from others but if you don’t know their Venus or the house it’s in you can try to look at the persons Sun sign instead but Venus is ideal.

A gift based on their:

Sun sign will make them feel seen and like you know them well, it will be a gift they may appreciate

Venus sign is all they’ve ever desired it’s the pinnacle of their ideal gift. Especially as Venus represents how we like to receive and experience love

Aries/ 1H Venus

Gym membership, running shoes, thrill seeking experiences like tickets to bungee jumping, rock climbing, a skydiving event, gym outfit, tickets to their favourite artist, tickets to festival, cool lighter, archery classes, tickets to sports games, a shirt with their teams logo or merch from their favourite artists, scissors set, cooking tools, hair styling products like hairspray, hair dye, Fitbit/apple watch, knives set, sports gear, heavy bass headphones, tickets for those room smashing experiences, take them clay pigeon shooting, family destroying board games like Risk or Catan, diy tattoo kit, diy piercing kit, theme park tickets.

Aries Venus are by nature thrill seekers, Aries is ruled by the head and has 1st house influences, they can certainly appreciate something that ignites passion, they are impulsive and quick by nature to pursue what they desire. They need gifts that match their decisive nature and to let out that pent up energy they have in them, I honestly think experiences are the best for them. Or a box of hair dye for their impulsive moments

Taurus/ 2H Venus

Hire a chef or take them to a really good restaurant for a 5 course meal that serves orgasmic food and has impeccable visuals/atmosphere OR you can even arrange a 7 course homemade meal with the finest of recipes! , fine jewellery adorned with a gemstone, culinary experiences, cooking classes, kitchenware, go to fragrantica.com and find a high quality perfume to give, premium home decor, art, antique items, antique furniture, comfortable cosy clothing, hot water bottle, gardening tools, plants, selection of seeds for their garden, diffuser, essential oils, desserts like baklava/ferro rocher, luxury goods, wellness retreat subscription, day at the spa, tea set, comfy velvet winter pillows and bed sheets

Oh my Taurus natives, they know how to break a bank for Christmas and if not they can enjoy luxury on a budget! They enjoy the finer things of life of course Venus ruled, they know how to induge in pleasures and satisfaction. Due to the earthy influence they have a green finger and a natural affinity with plants and gardening, they may love flowers or want to grow plants themselves. Taurus venuses are rather easy to gift, if you know them they usually have a vice, it may be sleep, food or pure laziness, get them something according to their vice and they will treasure it.

Gemini/ 3H Venus

Really cool stationary, Spotify subscription, comedy show tickets, books from their favourite genre, a notebook, Grammarly subscription, cards against humanity board game, Duolingo subscription, multiplayer games, home kit recording studio, language learning stuff, calligraphy classes, kindle, portable car charger, Bluetooth speaker, karaoke machine, suitcase, travel accessories, a musical instrument, sealing wax kit, creative hobby supplies, microphone, podcasting equipment, audio editing software, a car, vr headset, Nintendo online subscription, Netflix/HBO/youtube/crunchyroll subscription

Gemini rules communication, short journeys and social engagement. Blessing these natives with tools to enhance their pleasant hobbies will make them swoon in gratitude, if you want to get them something make it engaging and whimsical. These natives are ruled by mercury and always welcome something that requires the mind.

Cancer/ 4H Venus

A cooking set, baking set, comfort food, commission artwork of the family, family photos, some really nice home decor, a keepsake/musical box adorned with velvets and soft materials that will store sentimental objects, a locket necklace, family recipe book make a recipe book of all their favourite foods and some foods you know they’d like, soft fluffy blanket, the family heirloom, hand crafted quilt, hand painted ceramic mug, animal crossing game, sims 4 game, games relating to the home, bring and fly in family that are far away as a surprise and cook their favourite meal together, household utilities, lush bath products, a personal chef for a day, a personal butler for a day, custom family tree art, ancestry DNA kit (please be careful though once you use them they keep your data and if they get hacked your information is out there), home movie night, comfy slippers and pyjamas, family board games, this christmas make them Christmas dinner this time.

Cancer rules the home and there’s nothing more appreciated by a cancer Venus than things that remind them of this. They are by nature expressive and nurturing, this time let them be pampered!

Leo/ 5H Venus

Hair care products, gift card for their favorite store, make them an edit no joke like a TikTok edit that makes them look really cool, one of those light up mirrors or a pretty handheld one if they don’t have one already, book them a photoshoot together if they don’t like the camera maybe post them on your social media and show affection for these bold natives, theatre tickets, bold sunglasses, luxury watch, good jewellery, VIP experiences like backstage passes or reservation to exclusive invite only restaurants, designer clothing that is a prestigious brand they love, commission style artwork, make them a playlist of songs that reminds you of them, fine wine, personalised fragrance creation that allows them to create their own signature fragrance, personalised makeup makeover, hire a stylist for them

A perfect gift for Leo’s need to have an element of self expression, luxury and incorporate their personality that garners attention from peers. They need a gift that makes them feel special, something tailored specifically for them that cannot be gifted to anyone else. Personalised gifts do well either this placement too. When I think of these natives I just think of that Meghan Trainor music video “Me Too” watch that and you’ll get their vibe.

Virgo/ 6H Venus

Skincare products, a blender for smoothies, lots of cleaning products, multi purpose aesthetic storage containers, Quora or chat gpt subscription (these guys like to be well informed), give them scientifically researched bath products that have all that vitamin breakdown qualities, make them a notion template to help them plan, quality office supplies like a desk organiser or chair, practical fitness gear like a yoga mat, a fitness tracker, get them a personal nutritionist, tailored meal prep services, bookshelf organiser system, a stylish briefcase, home office makeover (BUT PLEASE GET THEIR PERMISSION FIRST), online course subscription, digital subscription to news feed, you can never go wrong with practical things, an ikea haul, Costco membership, minimalist decor, multi vitamins, a precision watch, set of labelling and sorting tools, a neat tidy chess board, get them a nice little pet, honestly for some reason whenever I think of Virgos I think of matcha. Get them something matcha based.

Virgo Venus natives need gifts that resemble their routine and organisation, they can be rather difficult to purchase for since they have such a specific taste in mind. Gift cards are practical for them but they really need something that allows them to be more prepared. Take them out for comparison price shopping like say if you want to get them a sofa tell them you’ll take them out to Costco, Amazon, ikea, and compare the best ones. They are also very clean and efficient.

Libra Venus/ 7H Venus

Trending Make up like the fenty hot chocolit heat lip gloss, Korean skincare products, beautiful piece of art, a wedding ring 😏, bouquet of flowers, take them to a beautiful botanical garden, fashionable accessories like a silk scarf, books and courses on design, take them to a couples romantic date, a couples workshop, write them a love letter, museum date, tickets to an art exhibition, fine dining, an astrology synastry reading, if they’re single set up a blind date with someone who you KNOW they would like (make sure they’re handsome/pretty), couples retreat, love coach Patreon subscription, pottery/painting classes, relationship podcast subscription, relationship psychology books, fine fragrance/cologne

Libra is ruled by Venus and 7th house, all things related to love beauty and pleasure align with this native, even if they are single they have a natural gift for delving into relationships. Make sure that whatever gift you give them it is pleasing and sensual

Scorpio/ 8H Venus

Intimate gifts, a psychological crime documentary playlist like Epstein island documentary or YouTubers who speak of renowned cult leaders, personalised astrology reading, a dark seductive fragrance, dark artwork, dominance and submission guide book, shadow work journal with a lock on it, dark poetry and literature, escape room adventure tickets, monopoly game, dungeons and dragons game equipment, bdsm accessories, personalised erotic art, leather/latex clothing, bonding activities, empowering books like 48 Laws of Power, martial arts training, taxidermy, personal development workshops, intense workout equipment like a punching bag, chess, daggers, locks on their door or for their belongings like installing a lock for their drawers, buy them a ring camera and subscription, wine tasting experience

Give them something sultry and deep, it has to be psychological and empowering. They are not impressed by superficial gifts that mean nothing to them. They really like gifts that allow them to explore their nature and the darker aspects of existence.

Sagittarius/ 9H Venus

A scratch off map that allows you to scratch off countries you’ve been to, a surprise holiday where you take them abroad, Duolingo subscription, a wanderlust journal for them to document their experiences, passport accessories, an electric guitar, drums, take them to a fireworks display or do one at home for them, a telescope, a drone, binoculars, philosophical books or religious books based on their own beliefs and religion, running shoes, horse riding in the sunset experience, musical instruments, motivational and positive affirmations book or make some for them yourself, a book collection of all their motivational and positive messages they have said, a compass, pay for their tuition for a course they’ve always wanted, traveling stuff like suitcases, pillow for travelling, a portable flask, a disposable camera, a Polaroid camera, a tent, tickets to a cultural festival, hiking gear, skiing gear, camping gear, sketchbook, a donation in their name

Sagittarius Venus and 9H venuses love the concept of exploration whether it be in the mind or physically, the best gift you could give them is one that allows them to take in so much culture, information and experiences.

Capricorn/ 10H Venus

Customisable credit card (CUCU is a good site for this), a nice power suit like business attire, vintage pocket calculator, cufflinks or a tie, formal shoes, pay for their CV to be analysed by professionals in their industry, elegant timeless clothing and jewellery, make them business cards, get them a corporate slave (an assistant will do), pay for business class flights for their next trip abroad, project management courses, tickets to Ted Talk event, take them to and big them up at networking and entrepreneurial opportunities, a sleek desk, submit their work for trophies and awards, quality furniture, Starbucks or their fave coffee place gift cards, a fountain pen, personalised desk name plate, professional photoshoot, designer accessories like a Swiss watch, leather wallet, cheque book, pay for a professional calligrapher to design their signature, time management software

Our sweet cap Venuses and 10Hers need their professional acknowledgment, give them anything timeless and a way for them to better themselves. They love being the best of the best so give them things that support their ambitions.

Aquarius/ 11H Venus

A 3D printer, high tech phone, a gamer console, smart home device like Alexa, chat gpt subscription, AI art pieces of them, rubix cube, VR headset, bespoke one of a kind art piece, tickets to a science technology conference or musem, networking events, phone case, futuristic home decor, membership to an niche club their interested in, mini indoor garden like a plant terrarium, pay for an astronomy stargazing experience for them, alt clothing, goal setting journal, a camaraderie for their friendships can be a bracelet for an example, tickets to a unique workshop according to their niche interests, video editing software, a unique invention prototype for the industry their interested in say if it were cars then a mini Tesla or something, volunteer together, design software, film festival tickets, social cause merchandise, unique fashion piece, astronomy kit, an AI boyfriend or girlfriend, take them a Ted talk.

Always remember the specific niche interests of these natives they like things that are very niche and so sometimes asking them is actually the best thing to do. But make sure it’s something they’re passionate about not all of these natives live tech but they certainly are innovative.

Pisces/ 12H Venus

Seashell necklace, watercolour paints, fantasy book collection, their favourite mangas, handmade artwork, stained glass window art, dream interpretation book, flowerpedia book, vinyls, yoga mat, contact lenses, tickets to their favourite artist like mitski or the sort, create a playlist for them that’s about fantasy and imagination, they might like Disney consider taking them to Disneyland, windchime, subscription to mindfulness app, astrology book, go to the aquarium together, windchimes, art supplies, a dream journal, sound healing instruments, pay for their spiritual retreat, zen garden decor, a mystical music box, water fountain, take them to a mesmerising body of water, prayer mats, diary, write them a heartfelt letter of how amazing they are, take them to a nature retreat, wearable art

Dreamy imaginative gifts would be perfect for these people, they need gifts that allow them to appreciate their escape world where they have a reality that’s just better than here. Give them things that are as beautiful as their inner world.

640 notes · View notes

hwaslayer · 6 months ago

Text

love you in slow motion (psh) | five.

♡ spotify playlist | series masterlist ♡

—summary: seonghwa will go through hell and back for you, as long as he can continue to see that smile on your face. because to him, that smile feels like a rainbow after the rain, thewarmth of the sun on a winter day. because to him, you’re more than just his bestfriend—you’re love. even though everyone seems to see that except you.

—pairing: park seonghwa x f!reader

—genre: (18+ - minors dni) bestfriends to lovers | fluff, angst, smut

—word count: 9k

—chapter warning: cussing/mature language, implied sexual content, lots of overthinking, crying, mentions of death and death anniversary, friends & family being like ?? 😭, flashbacks, mentions of alcohol consumption, unprotected sex — sorry if i missed anything & if it’s all over the place! i tried to edit as much as i can while im away!! but enjoy & ty for being patient with me 🫶🏼 if you need something different, here is part one of yeosang’s fic!

Seonghwa doesn't remember when exactly he fell in love with you.

It might've been when you watched all of his football games growing up.

It might've been when you beat up that one kid because he wouldn't stop bothering Hwa for the answers to the homework and called him out of his name unnecessarily.

It might've been when you'd come to his house and sneak through the back door just so you could lie down on his bedroom floor and listen to new music together until you fell asleep.

It might've been when you first got your license and drove him to the hospital and stayed by his side when his fever didn't go down.

It might've been the trip to Hanoi with his family.

Or, it might've been when you sat with him during his first day in 3rd grade at your school, even though he was a child and didn't really know what love meant. He was surrounded by it, and so he was familiar with it. You gave him the same vibes. It must've been, right?

Of course, he had been in relationships. Those relationships did make him feel like maybe, those feelings for you were a fleeting moment; something that would pass, especially since things hadn't changed between you two. He wasn't gonna force it. He might've believed at some point that it was probably all a lie, that he wasn't meant to be with you in the end.

An idea that was way too good to be true.

But, then those relationships would end and he'd be back to square one. And he'd sit there and reflect on everything, revisiting the idea if he was saved for someone else [you]. Truth be told, he did love his exes. They'll always have a special place in his heart. But along their journey, he always felt like this wasn't his end goal— that this instead was the fleeting moment, that particular something that would pass.

In the end, it was always gonna be you.

"So, what happened with Makayla?" Wooyoung asks as he cleans his table and starts unpacking some new supplies that had just been delivered.

"Nothing." Seonghwa shrugs. "Y/N came that morning, ran off, then Makayla kinda knew. I feel so fucked up about it cause she's so nice and understanding."

♡ FLASHBACK

Seonghwa smiles when Makayla steps into his car, her sweet perfume immediately filling the air. Earlier in the week, he had asked Makayla if she wanted to go to a casual dinner and she instantly replied saying she'd love to. It put a smile on Seonghwa's face, which felt nice after the gloomy and upsetting days he'd been having.

He takes her to a casual ramen restaurant in town; it's small, cozy and intimate. They sit at the bar next to each other, taking the time to get to know each other over some hot, comforting bowls of ramen. He finds that Makayla enjoys a lot of similar things; she's outgoing, likes to go on adventures and explore new places, try new foods, would always be down to try something thrilling like skydiving or zip-lining in a tropical place.

Shit like that.

Seonghwa isn't as adventurous but he'd be down, and he likes that about her. On top of that, she's really sweet and laid back. Seonghwa doesn't feel like he has to try and paint this certain image to impress her. He doesn't; he can be himself for the most part, despite the fact that he's still having to try and keep it cool since it's the first time they're hanging out. Even when they finish their ramen, they sit there for another 30 minutes or so just chatting it up— learning more about likes and dislikes, past relationships, you, even.

"Yeah, so there's me, San, Wooyoung, Hongjoong and Y/N. I met San, Wooyoung and Hongjoong in college, and Y/N—" He pauses a bit as he twirls the straw in his cup. "She's been my bestfriend since the third grade."

"That's sweet. So, you guys are all close and everything? Y/N probably knows you the best, hm?" Makayla chuckles.

"Yeah, she does. I guess. We've been through a lot together." Seonghwa looks at her and nods. Makayla isn't one to press more, but she can tell there's a little more to you and what you mean to Seonghwa. Of course, he's not gonna divulge now. Makayla doesn't expect him to. But there's a pause, a silence that falls between them that says there's more to it than he's letting up.

She'll let it be, though. She can tell you are special to Seonghwa.

"That's nice, though. To have someone by your side after all these years. You two are still going strong. I feel like a lot of friendships crumble, or people just get distant because we grow and become different people over time."

"Mmyeah. I think we are. We're just.." Seonghwa shakes her head. "Yeah, nevermind. We're just in our fighting phase but it's not anything we haven't experienced before." He lies to skip out on details. He's torn between telling Makayla the messy ass truth or keeping it on the low— cause honestly, this was a harmless dinner. Seonghwa didn't expect anything out of this.

Maybe he should've just been honest from the beginning but his head is fucking everywhere right now, and he doesn't wanna think about it.

"I see. I hope things get better."

"Yeah, same." Seonghwa lets out a pathetic chuckle before sipping the last bit of his water and standing. "Anyway, ready to get out of here?"

"Sure. Thanks for dinner." He smiles and takes her hand to lead her out of the restaurant.

"Course. Thanks for joining me." It's a bit of a chilly night tonight, Seonghwa and Makayla can see their breath in the air as they walk back to the car together. Seonghwa truthfully is having a good time with her and he doesn't necessarily wanna part ways so soon. He might take this as a distraction, he might use this as a way to get even closer and have something to build off of— he couldn't really tell you what exactly goes through his head at this next moment. He can't lie that it is a good distraction from the bullshit he's been dealing with, and although he doesn't mean to compare Makayla to you, he can't help but say she's been making him feel way better about himself than you lately.

He hates that it even has to come down to this because at the end of the day, life clearly still revolves around you.

Seonghwa tugs the passenger door open and lets her get settled before he hops into the driver's seat. He tugs on his jacket a bit before starting the car and turning up the heat, pulling out his phone to quickly see if there's any notifications he needs to tend to from the boys [you].

"Any plans for the rest of the night?" She shakes her head.

"Nope, none at all. What about you?"

"None. Should we find something else to do then?"

"I'm down!"

"Anything specific come to mind or.. we can hang out at my spot, if you want? No pressure. I can take you home, too. It's whatever you wanna do." Seonghwa looks at her from the driver's seat.

"No, we can go to your place. I'm fine with that."

"You sure?"

"Mhm." She smiles, giving Seonghwa the green light to start up the car and drive back to his apartment.

When they get back to his place, he grabs a bottle of wine and little snacks before popping on a thriller movie she suggests. He plans to keep it chill for the evening. He doesn't plan for anything specific to happen, he doesn't plan for the night to go a certain way. He lets it be; even when Makayla scoots next to him and cuddles up under his arm. Even when his fingers seem to be tracing circles on her arm, even when he suddenly feels the urge to kiss her.

To feel something.

And so one kiss eventually turns into another, and another deep kiss. Then, it eventually turns into Seonghwa tearing off her clothes and vice versa as they rush to his room and get in his sheets. He quickly rolls on a condom and gets her laid out underneath him. He enjoys this, yes— he's not gonna lie. He's a man and he's got needs, that's why he's indulging in every second of this. He fucks her good, deep into the mattress. Makayla's moaning his name and digging her nails deep into his shoulders, whining right into his ear and begging for more of him.

It's an ego boost, and it's making him feel ten times better about himself.

He makes her cum twice that night, from missionary and from behind. He hopes his neighbors don't complain about the noise— headboard lowkey banging into the wall with his name being called out like a mantra.

He has a good fucking time, though. He doesn't kick her out. He lets her stay the night, handing her a shirt to sleep in to feel more comfortable. He holds her and falls asleep quickly, the morning coming not too long after they had fallen asleep together.

Seonghwa planned to sleep in a 'lil bit that morning since he wasn't needed at work until 10am. In his head, he had planned to wake up at his own liking, prep a small breakfast for him and Makayla before offering to take her home on the way to work.

But, his plan is completely ruined when he hears a loud knock on the front door that also startles Makayla awake.

"Are you expecting someone?" Seonghwa's brow turns up as he ponders for a bit. He isn't expecting any packages and he doesn't remember putting in any maintenance requests. So.. no?

"No." He gets up, but Makayla does too and he feels a bit bad her sleep was ruined. "You don't have to get up, you can stay in bed if you'd like."

"No, it's okay. I should probably get up and get ready." He gives her a small smile before walking out, throwing on a white tank top to cover his indecency and tidying up a bit for whoever the hell is on the other side of the door. Who he expected, he wasn't sure. But he sure as hell wasn't expecting it to be you on the other side this early in the morning.

He swings the door open and he's not sure what to say or do, and it doesn't help that Makayla is brushing past behind him in his shirt to gather some of her things.

"Oh." Is all you say, and Seonghwa feels his heart break to a million pieces when he sees the look on your face. You're trying your hardest not to show how much it hurts you, but he knows you. He knows you well, that's for damn sure.

"Y/N—"

"It's good, I didn't meant to interrupt, I'm sorry— I'll catch you later."

♡ END

"I mean, it's not like you were expecting Y/N to come on that morning. Plus, you didn't necessarily lie or do anything behind anyone's back. You tried." Wooyoung feels a little silly knowing he knew about your plan, but he definitely didn't know Makayla spent the night until now. He took a 'harmless dinner' for what it really was; not Seonghwa taking her back home for good times and good vibes in the sheets. Or else, he probably would've prevented you from going on that morning and lied about Hwa's shift time to keep everything as smooth as possible. But, it doesn't make any sense when Wooyoung really thinks about it. Because even if he did tell you Hwa had an early shift and that it'd be better to see him later, would that help fix anything? Which exactly is the lesser evil?

For Wooyoung, he thinks it just had to unfold the way it did, unfortunately.

"Mm. Yeah." Is all Seonghwa says before finishing up wrapping some KT tape on his client. "Makayla was cool, though."

"Took her out and took her home, ey." His client chimes in, making Seonghwa shake his head.

"Thought I'd move on." Seonghwa shrugs.

"Clearly not." Wooyoung snorts, tossing in some fun to brighten the mood. "No, but, honestly. I think it had to happen this way? Instead of it getting too deep with Makayla and Y/N comes back around? Less mess."

"Less mess is always nice." His client chimes in again. "So, what are you gonna do? Does Tyson know about the whole thing with his cousin?"

"I don't know. I don't think so. He hasn't mentioned anything. If he asked, I'd be honest about it." Seonghwa shrugs. He wasn't entirely hiding anything and he likes to think he tried to go about this as normally as possible. It wasn't like he was out to intentionally hurt Makayla. He could never. He just didn't expect things to play out the way that it did, and he could never lie either.

"Well. What're you gonna do now?"

"Somehow talk to Y/N."

"You haven't heard from her since then, huh? Well, I guess since the club." Wooyoung corrects himself.

"Nope. I have not." Seonghwa's bottom lip pokes out into a pout before patting his client on the shoulder to signal that he was finished with the KT tape.

"Damn, Hwa." Is all his client says before walking out of the room, making both Seonghwa and Wooyoung chuckle.

"I really wanted her to take the lead on this one."

"Technically, she did. It just happened to be at the wrong time." Wooyoung shrugs. "Give her a little bit of time before you reach out again. She probably feels really defeated after that. And don't get me wrong, I love you both and the situation is unfair for both ends. But I think right now you two just need the space."

"Yeah. I'm not gonna force anything right now. I just hope she's able to talk to me before jumping to more conclusions."

"Mhm."

"Have you been able to talk to her recently?" Seonghwa fully turns to Wooyoung.

"Yeah, but she's not really saying anything about it. I think Sannie—"

"Sannie.. what?"

"She called Sannie after the whole thing and cried to him about it."

"Oh." His heart breaks hearing that you've cried over him yet again. Maybe Wooyoung was right— maybe you both needed this space after all.

♡ FLASHBACK

"San? Sannie?" You repeatedly call his name over the phone and San is confused. He has just woken up, but he's immediately alert when he hears you crying, your voice trembling on the other line.

"Hey Y/N?" He says in a questioning tone as he sits up in bed and rubs at his eyes. "What's going on? Is everything okay?"

"I'm so fucking stupid." You quickly start your car and reverse out of the spot to drive off.

"Don't say that, what's going on? Talk to me."

"I just tried to talk to Seonghwa about everything. I was gonna tell him everything, I was gonna be honest. Sannie, I was gonna be honest—"

"Slow down, where are you?"

"I'm going home." You cry and San starts to get up and get ready.

"I'll meet you there and we can talk more, okay? Just please get home safely and I'll be there." You nod even though San can't see you, trying as best as possible to race home in a safe manner. All you wanna do is crawl into bed and cry everything out so you can put on a brave face for work later.

When you get home, you immediately toss your pajamas back on and curl up on the couch. You put on a random movie for background noise, picking up your phone to see the missed calls and texts from Seonghwa.

[seonghwa]: y/n where are you?

[seonghwa]: can we talk, please?

[seonghwa]: just text me back or call me.

[seonghwa]: y/n please talk to me.

You let out a sigh and set the phone aside, not knowing how to respond to him right now. Your thoughts are all over the place, and you're regretting everything that's happened between you and Seonghwa recently. You were too late and this was the price of your actions, reactions, everything.

This is exactly what you were afraid of— losing Seonghwa, even as your bestfriend, for good. Because now, things seem irreparable. Your relationship won't feel the same and it's truly awful.

"It's me, San." You suddenly hear at the door before he lightly jiggles the doorknob. "I'm coming in, okay?" You don't say anything and he proceeds, eyes instantly landing on your form on the couch. "What happened?" San positions himself on the middle of the couch, looking down at you with sympathy. He really does hate seeing you cry— he's hated it since he's known you and grown close to you.

"It's too late. I'm too late. I'm so stupid." You cry, explaining to San about how you finally gained the courage to talk to Seonghwa. You tell San you woke up early and tried to put yourself in a good mindset in order to work through things properly. You tell him about how you got yourself there, ran up the steps and knocked on his door without turning back. You explain the look on Hwa's face, you explain how surprised he was to see you.

You explain how you ran off when you saw her in his shirt.

You explain how your heart dropped, you explain how awful the feeling was hearing him call after you, seeing his texts and missed calls.

"But, he was calling after you. He wants to talk to you Y/N."

"No. I ruined it. He's probably just gonna explain how he needed to move on and tell me shit that's gonna hurt like hell."

"Why don't you hear him out, hm? It could be entirely different, and he might wanna work this out with you."

"We kissed at the club. So after all of this— the kiss, the argument after the fight with Mingi, today—I don't think Seonghwa and I will ever be the same again. I fucked it up." You ramble on and San's slightly having a hard time keeping up cause he's stuck on the fact that you just told him you and Hwa kissed. It's not like he's entirely surprised, it just makes sense as to why things feel too fucking complicated.

He sees why now. But truthfully, as both your friend and Seonghwa's, it's not his place to say anything. The best advice he has is to just let it play out how it should. You'll get your time to talk to Seonghwa. Whatever unfolds from there is what will unfold.

"Hey, don't say that. Please don't." San says softly. "I know everything feels messed up and all over the place right now, but I know Seonghwa wants to fix things just as badly as you do. You're his bestfriend before anything, he'll never let that happen."

"I don't know what to do."

"Why don't you give yourself more time and space? Talk to Seonghwa when you've had a chance to clear your head and gather your thoughts properly." He gently rubs at your back. "This is the best thing you can do for yourself right now. For you and him, maybe." You dig your head into the pillow and release a sigh, almost finding the need to scream at how frustrating everything is.

But, he's right.

Time.

♡ END

"Heard you two kissed at the club." Wooyoung teases Seonghwa, causing him to toss a roll of gauze at his head.

"Shut up."

"Ow, what? It's cute!" Seonghwa glares at him before letting out a sigh.

"It just seems like everything's against us right now." Seonghwa laughs a bit, but deep down, he isn't sure how he feels. He's sad. He's heartbroken. He's not sure if he wanted the kiss to happen purely because of what you two are now. Because even though he knows it's not the only problem, it is probably the biggest.

"Give it time, yeah? You two will talk it out when things settle and it'll get better no matter what that looks like. I know you mean a lot to Y/N, and she wouldn't just drop 16 years of friendship over a silly little squabble."

"Mm." Seonghwa hums.

"Have you talked to Makayla since then?"

"Yeah, and she still wants to be friends. There weren't any expectations so.." Seonghwa shrugs. "At least she doesn't fucking hate me even though I deserve it"

"Dude, again. You weren't intentionally trying to hurt her. It's just a complicated situation."

"Yeah. Anyway. You're coming to my dad's thing right?"

"Of course, the fuck?" Wooyoung laughs. "This weekend, right?"

"Yup."

"Yeah, I'll be there."

"I wonder if Y/N is still coming."

"She will." Wooyoung gives him a small smile. "I know she will."

The weekend comes quick and Seonghwa is hauling ass from the wee early morning hours to get ready for his dad's retirement party. He's helping fix up the house and the backyard before running to the store to grab more things his mom needs. Though he's not trippin' about being tasked with errands alone, he'd usually have you tag along for company and extra hands. He feels it a lot today, and it's killing him how he can't even do this with you.

He doesn't even know if you're coming, or if you remembered, even if Wooyoung reassured him.

"You're done?" Seonghwa's mom asks, peering over his shoulders as he hauls in grocery bags and a cake.

"Yeup. Why? Don't tell me you need more, ma. I told you—" She playfully pinches him on the arm and furrows his brows while he lets out a low 'ow.'

"Told me what, hm? That's all! I'm not adding to the list! Where's Y/N?"

"What do you even mean?" She crosses her arms.

"You normally do these things with her. Where is she? Is she okay?" He shrugs.

"Sorry, she's busy." She eyes him, taking note of the way he shrinks and avoids eye contact. "Where do you want me to put the groceries and cake? Fridge for now?"

"Mhm. Thank you."

"Where's dad?"

"Showering and getting ready for his special day."

"I probably should do that, too.”

"Y/N is coming, right?"

"Mom, yes." He says in a slightly exasperated tone because he doesn't know the real truth. He honestly just wants to stop talking about you for a second. Just one second. "I'm gonna get ready." He walks off to get ready, sorting through his duffle bag of clothes that he brought over.

His mom likes to tease him, even though deep down, she gets sad when you two fight. It's not even just the fact that you welcomed him so warmly when he was the new kid in town, it was the fact that she has never seen Seonghwa connect with someone so well. You've always pulled the best out of him, and you were always there to make him laugh, to make him happy. Despite all the troubles you've endured, you've always treated them with respect and you've always shown love even if your own life felt like it was lacking of such. This didn't feel like any other fight she's witnessed between you two— call it mother's instinct, but she knew there was way more to it than Seonghwa wants to let on. She just hopes that whatever it is, you two can pull through. She knows you both are stronger than that.

When Seonghwa gets showered and throws on some better clothes fit for the occasion, he helps his mom and dad get the house clean and tidy for the party. His dad had officially retired, and Seonghwa was happy he could finally rest. Enjoy the things he loved doing. Spend more time with his mom. He helps put up the decorations around the house, fixing up the backyard and getting the grill ready for the food. Wooyoung, Hongjoong and San are one of the first to arrive, along with his relatives. They immediately start drinking and enjoying themselves, playing music and grilling meat to start kicking things off as more people trickle in.

Wooyoung briefly offers to take over the grill while Seonghwa heads into the kitchen to pull out more of the fruits and non-alcoholic drinks for his cousins and relatives that don't drink. He's busy setting things aside when his mom's loud scream startles him, his eyes immediately diverting to the source near the front door.

"Y/N's here with Yaya, Soyeon and Charli!" Seonghwa's mom lets out an excited yell when she sees her favorites walk through the door, throwing her arms around you for a big hug. Seonghwa turns from the kitchen, watching as you greet his family members that immediately swarm you at the entry. You happily greet his dad near the living room, giving him a big hug and congratulations for his retirement. It's the first time he'd be speaking to you after everything, let alone seeing you. He tenses up a bit, but he doesn't ignore the excitement he feels seeing your face, your smile. You're in a white denim maxi skirt and a black off-the-shoulder top, and Seonghwa can't help but stare.

"Hey!" Soyeon playfully punches him on the bicep and pulls him out of his thoughts, with Chacha screaming at the top of her lungs right next to her mom. "Chacha, jeez." Yaya laughs when she hugs him first.

"She sure loves her Uncle Hwa."

"Uncle Hwa!" She continues to scream, making Seonghwa laugh and swoop her into his arms. He gives Soyeon a one-armed hug before placing a kiss on Charli's temple.

"Chacha!" He matches her excitement. "Missed you, pea." He turns to Soyeon. "Junseo's at the restaurant?" She nods.

"Yep! Holding it down like always." She laughs. "He wanted to be here, though." She turns to Charli. "Baby, let's go eat first? You can play with Uncle Hwa after." Charli whines but doesn't fight it, making Hwa promise time after time that he'll play with her after she finishes her food. He does, anyway. He'll do anything to keep that smile on her face.

At this time, you finally make your way to the kitchen and Seonghwa isn't sure how to act. You give him a tiny, toothless smile before throwing one arm around him, clearly avoiding eye contact as much as possible.

"Hey." Seonghwa says, hugging you back. "You drove with Soyeon and Yaya?"

"Mhm."

"Should've told me so I could've picked you guys up."

"It's okay, Hwa." You give him another reassuring smile before grabbing a cup to fill up with some of the fruit juice his mom made. "Is everyone else here?"

"Yeah. Outside in the backyard. Food is out there, too."

"Thanks." You say, sipping your cup before walking out to the backyard. Seonghwa lowly groans to himself when he realizes he's being dumb, maybe slightly afraid, to talk about everything that's been happening.

Maybe it isn't the right time, either. But, he hates being this way with you. It feels terrible, and he wants nothing more than to just be okay with you.

"Are you and Y/N okay?"

"Ma, we're fine. I promise."

"Park Seonghwa if I find out that you've done something to her—"

"I didn't do anything!" He almost squeaks when he responds. "What about me, mom? How about 'are you okay, Seonghwa?'"

"I ask you all the time and you always give me the same answer!" She responds in a higher tone, but Seonghwa knows she's teasing just to push his buttons. "You never want me in your business anyway!"

"Whatever." He sighs and shakes his head, walking out to the backyard to hang out with everyone. Everyone old enough to drink [and isn't driving] raises their cups high for a big toast before knocking some soju back. Seonghwa catches up by taking the shot Wooyoung hands him to the neck, making a face at the bitter brand of soju they've decided on.

You've parked yourself in between Hongjoong and San, with Yaya, Soyeon and Charli sitting nearby as they eat their food. You have a plate in hand while you laugh along with San, Hongjoong and Wooyoung poking fun and making faces at Charli nearby. Seonghwa plops onto the empty bench space next to San, sipping on his drink while watching his cousins play in front of everyone. San sees you shift in your position a bit, now paying more attention to Charli, Wooyoung and Hongjoong, while Seonghwa continues to quietly sip on his drink. San isn't gonna lie— he feels a bit awkward since the tension is coming from both ways. But, he brushes it off anyway; trying to keep everything as normal as possible to keep the party running on a smooth note.

"Uncle Hwa." Charli comes in front of him with a huge smile on her face.

"Yes?" He gives her the same smirk, setting his cup down onto the table. "Finished eating?"

"Ya. But, mommy says I can't play yet."

"30 minutes!" Soyeon yells from her seat.

"She's right. You need to let your food settle." He pokes at her tummy and pulls her onto his lap. "Here." He hands her his phone to play on.

"Uncle Hwa." She calls for him again as she watches him pull up her favorite game.

"Mhm?" She puts up her tiny hands near his ear to whisper something so incredibly confidential:

"Are you and Titi Y/N fighting?" He chuckles.

"A bit, but we'll be okay."

"Why?" She pouts at him.

"Just grown up things, Chacha. We'll be okay." He repeats.

"You promise?" She's still whispering and Seonghwa's heart melts when she puts up her pinky for a pinky-promise. "Titi Y/N loves you. Don't be mad."

"I'm not mad." He wraps his pinky around hers. "Promise, okay? Here." He passes her his phone once the game loads.

"Uncle Hwa, I wanna play with your legos." She plays Mario Kart Tour furiously on his phone.

"Which one do you wanna play with?"

"Any." Seonghwa laughs and nods, carrying her as he stands to grab his legos from his stash in his old room.

"Let's go find one, hm?" You watch as Seonghwa carries Charli with ease into the house, remembering the night you two spent with Charli a few weeks ago. Feels pretty distant, and it hits you how sad your situation with Seonghwa is right now. You quickly shake off your thoughts and stand from your seat to throw your trash away and grab another drink, grabbing more trash from the group when they see you making your way inside. You toss the paper plates away, engaging in small talk with Seonghwa's cousins as they pass in and out of the house. You pour yourself another cup, getting slightly startled by Charli zooming out of the house screaming in pure happiness while holding one of Hwa's small lego sets.

"That girl talks in screams." You mutter to yourself. "Oh shit." You look at the small spill to the side of your cup, letting out a sigh when you reach over for a napkin—

"Here." Seonghwa cocks a brow up when he hands you a napkin. "Can always count on you to make a mess, I guess." You roll your eyes at his sarcasm and snatch the napkin out of his hand to wipe up the spill.

"Thanks." Seonghwa continues to stand there, awkwardly watching you clean up the spill. You turn to him once more, furrowing your brows in confusion. "What?"

"We're just not gonna talk about it?"

"We're not doing this right now." You look at him. "Not at your dad's retirement party."

"Then when, Y/N? You're just gonna leave everything like this?"

"I don't know, Seonghwa! I guess so, cause I'm definitely not doing this now." He lets out a hefty sigh before slowly nodding his head.

"Wow, so you're fine with—"

"Stop." Seonghwa licks his lips and purses them together before breaking eye contact first. It's the easiest comeback he has, and he's not sure why he feels so angry, so triggered, right now. It's probably because he wishes you had just talked to him before the party. It's probably because it's been too long and he's not even sure where this leaves you two anymore. It's probably because he misses you and wishes he could just hug you. Call you. Text you. Do everything that he used to. Regardless of the kiss.

"Alright." Seonghwa says, surrendering and waving the white flag. You catch the way his jaw slightly clenches when he tears his eyes away from you and breaks eye contact. It does break your heart, and you hate that this is what you two have become. But, you weren't gonna do this on his dad's special day. Not at his dad's party.

"Excuse me." You grab your cup and Seonghwa steps aside to let you walk out first. He follows suit, shutting the sliding door behind him. Your friends and Soyeon don't fail to catch how bothered you two look even though you try to keep it under wraps, continuing to keep distance even as the afternoon goes on.

While Charli continues to play with the lego set in between playing with Seonghwa's baby cousins, you, your friends, and Seonghwa's relatives engage in more drinking and karaoke. Seonghwa and his mom take a moment to say little speeches over the cake, congratulating his dad for his retirement and for reaching a milestone in his life. You go about the party as normal as possible, keeping the energy and the good vibes alive even though it truly feels the worst not being able to genuinely be happy around the people you love the most.

You knew it was time to talk to Seonghwa soon, and that he was waiting for you to do it. He had been waiting for you, and god knows how disappointed he must have been in you.

Everything just feels so fucked up, and you feel so torn about everything. You wish you could just run away and hide from it all, even though you equally wanted to fix this and figure out where you two lie in all of this.

What about Makayla?

Was he still seeing her like that?

That's probably the one thing you were most afraid of. Seonghwa was your bestfriend. Despite all of this, you should be happy with whatever he chooses. He deserves it. He didn't deserve what you gave him at the club or how you failed to be honest about your feelings. This was all because of you.

As the evening arrives, you and Soyeon plan to leave in the next half hour due to Charli getting restless. As you pack some food to go for the both of you, Seonghwa's mom rushes over to you and puts her hand on your back. She looks at you lovingly like she always has, a soft smile on her face.

"Come here really quickly.” Her hand laces with yours as she shows you to their room. "I was cleaning up the garage the other day and found these photos and videos." She hands you some old photos of you, your dad, and Seonghwa and his dad while out. You flip through them, feeling the tears welling up in your bottom lids.

You missed your dad so, so much.

There were even photos of you and Seonghwa on the playground, photos of you and Seonghwa laughing while on a family trip, photos of you and Seonghwa hanging out in each other's backyards. Photos of you, your dad, Seonghwa and Seonghwa's dad together.

"This, too." His mom slips an old VHS tape into the VCR and you giggle a bit at how long it's been since you've watched something on tape. A huge wave of nostalgia immediately rushes over you as you gently place the photos down and watch the video of you and your dad during the fourth grade trip to the local zoo.

"He truly adored you more than anything. You will always be his little girl." She says and you start crying. Seonghwa's mom leans her head on your shoulder, and you lean onto her; silently enjoying the footage together. All of this was perfect timing, and you knew Seonghwa's mom did it for a reason. Your dad's death anniversary would be coming later in the week and it was everything you needed to find some comfort.

"I miss him."

"I know he misses you, too."

"Thank you." You look at her and give her a toothless smile. "Can I take these pictures?"

"Of course! Want the tapes, too?"

"Is it okay if I keep it here? I don't have a VCR." She laughs a bit and nods.

"Yes, absolutely." She rubs your arm before pulling you into another hug. "I'm glad you came out today."

"Why wouldn't I?"

"You and Seonghwa seem to be fighting." She makes a face that makes you laugh. "What happened? What did he do?"

"Nothing. It was me. We just got.. into a disagreement, I guess. It's my fault though, and I just haven't been able to talk to him to apologize."

"You two will be fine."

"I know." You give her another tiny, toothless smile. "I hope." The two of you sit together for a little longer, taking in the rest of the photos before you wrap it up and head back out to the party.

At this point, your friends are taking their leave, with Charli laying on Soyeon as her mom holds her. She hands you the bags of all the food you packed for yourself, Yaya and Soyeon, saying your goodbyes to everyone still around. You save Seonghwa for last, giving him a tiny smile as he pulls you into a full-armed hug. You embrace the hug, pressing your cheek against his chest before he pulls away and looks at you.

"Wait." He says, holding you by the shoulders. "Have you been crying?" He looks deeply into your eyes and takes note of your wet eyelashes. You brush it off and look away, shaking your head as a response.

"No, I haven't." You brush past him to finish saying bye to his parents before rushing out the door to your own family. Seonghwa furrows his brows and looks at his mom, realizing she also has wet lashes and just looked like she finished crying.

"Were you and Y/N crying together?"

"I showed her some photos and videos with her dad that I found in the garage." She shows him the date on her phone and it’s enough for Seonghwa to understand what it means.

"Oh. I see." Is all he says. "Was she okay?"

"I think so. She can always say she's okay even though deep down, she's not." She puts her hand on Seonghwa's arm. "I don't know if it'll ever get easier for her."

"Goodmorning Hwa! Have you heard from Y/N yet? I wanted to ask her something but she hadn't texted me back and her phone is off. I think I might know why, though." Seonghwa lets out a breath and licks his lips before responding.

"I see. I'll check." He says. "I got you."

"Thanks. If you do see her, tell her to call me later when she's up for it."

"I will." And with that, Seonghwa cuts the call. He looks at his watch before devouring the rest of his breakfast, grabbing his bag and heading out the door much earlier than expected. It's a crisp, cold day. Somewhat of a drastic change compared to the days they've been having. Seonghwa can see his breath in the air, and he's regretting the light windbreaker jacket he grabbed as he rushed out the door— hoping it'd get warmer.

But, it doesn't.

He has to be at work in a bit, and he's probably even gonna be late. He's just concerned about you, and even though things still feel weird, awkward— he knows he needs to be here for you. Especially during this time.

And Seonghwa's timing couldn't be any more perfect. Because although today isn't the exact day of your dad's death anniversary, it's in two days and you never know how to prepare. Lately, you've found yourself avoiding the exact day, visiting your dad’s grave a few days earlier to say some words, say your peace. Cry and reminisce. When the day comes, you try to keep yourself busy. You work and you work, and you spend time with Yaya, or Soyeon, or even Seonghwa's family because it's the love you need to surround yourself with. As much as you love them all dearly, they aren't your dad and it never gets easier. It's an unbearable pain you can't even describe. It doesn't go away. It just sits there, leaning onto your already-broken heart and weighing heavily on the surface.

You've been quietly sitting at your dad'd grave, fingers tracing over his picture. You smile whenever you see his bright smile, his eyes holding all the irreplaceable love in the world. You're not even sure how long it's been since you got here, maybe an hour or two. It's cold, but you don't want to leave. You want to spend as much time as you can being here even though it is hard.

You continue to cry and slowly fix the flowers around his grave and other offerings. You set one of the framed pictures of you, Seonghwa, and your dads onto his grave before crying, and crying some more. Suddenly, you feel someone drape a jacket over your shoulders, and with the circumstances, you would've been spooked if it were any other day. But, you feel at ease. You feel comforted. You feel completely fine because everything feels familiar. Your feelings are confirmed when Seonghwa wraps his arm around you and pulls you close.

"It's cold, how long have you been out here for?"

"Awhile."

"You should've called me." Is all he says before there's a brief silence that falls between you two.

"I always think it'll get easier." You mumble as you wipe away at your tears. "When a new year comes, I always feel like it'll be the year I'll finally be able to process this and say my peace to it." You start breaking down again and Seonghwa sits still, silently listening to you cry. "But, it never turns out that way. It just gets harder."

"It's an unbearable pain that doesn't go away. I'm sorry it had to be you, and I wish it didn't turn out this way. I wish it wasn't like this for you." Seonghwa says lowly as he continues to hug you and keep you close. "Your dad is always here, watching over you. And I know he'd be so proud of you for being so strong and overcoming all the adversity that came your way."

"I just miss him, Hwa. I really wish I could hug him again. I'll never forgive myself for taking advantage of all those chances and for being too comfortable."

"Y/N, this is the sort of tragedy that you can't control. It's awful, but you would have never known. There was nothing you could have done to prevent it. You did your best as his daughter, and I know he appreciated every moment until the end. I know he felt your love through everything." You cry onto his shoulder, letting everything that you still have left in you out. Seonghwa continues to hold you close, hand rubbing up and down your arm as his cheek rests on the top of your head.

"You really didn't have to come, pichu."

"And let you do this alone? I don't think so." You shift in your position to look at him. He gently takes a thumb underneath your eyes, wiping away at your tears.

"Can we talk? At my place?"

"Yeah. I'll come as soon as I'm done with work, okay?" You nod and Seonghwa gives you a tiny smile. The two of you sit in silence for a little longer before you're saying your goodbyes and heading your separate ways.

"By the way, Soyeon wanted to ask you something." He dips his head. "Call her when you get home." You nod again. "Drive safely for me." He taps your door frame before shutting it close and heading to his own car. You watch in your mirror, waiting for Seonghwa to step into his car before you drive off and head home.

Getting home, you immediately wash up, get into comfier clothes and call Soyeon to check in with her when you see her texts. You agree to picking up a few extra shifts throughout the week to cover for Jini finally taking some time off for personal reasons. You hang out on the couch, putting on a reality TV show you had already finished— you figured it'd be good for background noise. Filling up the emptiness of your space. You end up taking a long nap, waking up close to dinner by Yaya calling you into the house to share some food with her. It felt nice catching up on sleep, since you weren’t able to get much the night before. You spend most of your early evening with Yaya, helping her clean up around the kitchen before you retreat back to your place and pick up your phone when a text goes off.

[seonghwa]: need anything for dinner?

[you]: no i ate already, ty. just get yourself something!

[seonghwa]: okay. i'll be over in a few mins

You tidy up even more as if it's the first time Seonghwa is coming over. But, you feel nervous all over again. You feel like every inch of your apartment has to be clean in order to prep; overall, it feels like nothing can really prep you for whatever will go down tonight between you and Seonghwa and this is only helping distract you from that thought. You just hope it ends on a good note.

"Sorry it took me a little longer, had hella shit to do for the trainees today." You shrug as you look at him from the couch, wrapped up in your blanket.

"It's okay."

"What'd you do when you got home?"

"Hm, clean. Nap. Eat dinner with Yaya. How was work?" He shrugs.

"Tiring." He plops next to you on the couch. You notice he's drinking a protein shake, with nothing else in hand.

"You didn't get anything to eat?" He shakes his head.

"I'm not really hungry."

"Hm, okay." You hum. "Thanks for still coming over even though you had a long day." He looks at you and gives you a toothless smile.

"Course." You scoot a little closer and he continues to watch you. He watches the cute little frown on your face build— staring at him all doe-eyed and it makes his heart flutter.

"I'm sorry for everything, pichu. I didn't mean to get mad at you that night the fight broke out. I just didn't wanna see you hurt and I'm stupid for not pushing Mingi away. For finding excuses. You shouldn't have to save me every single time and I'm sorry it has been that way over the years." You tilt your head. "I really am sorry, and I didn't mean to make things more complicated especially with the kiss. I probably ruined things with Makayla—"

"We're just friends." He chimes in. "We're just friends and you didn't ruin anything."

"She was at your place? In your clothes?" He nods and chuckles a bit.

"Yeah, cause things escalated for one night. I'm not gonna lie. But, that's really it. She knew.." Seonghwa looks at you and shakes his head. "Nevermind."

"No, tell me. She knew, what?" You place your hand on his and gentle shake it.

"She knew the way I felt about you, especially after that morning."

"Oh."

"I guess she could just tell."

"I'm sorry, Hwa." He clicks his teeth and caresses your cheek.

"Stop saying sorry. Nothing was ruined. Everything's good between us and we're still friends."

"Where does that leave us?"

"You know what I want. What do you want?" You look at him for a moment, really look at him, and he's patiently waiting for your response. His big, brown eyes are holding hope, holding love, holding every bit of affection he has for you— even though he's trying his best to keep it at bay. At this moment, you couldn't even question how Seonghwa felt for you because it's overflowing from his look alone. He really wanted you. He really wanted to give you the world, if you'd let him.

"I'm just scared, Hwa." You say, close to a whisper— bottom lip trembling. He lifts your chin as he scoots closer, keeping you close and warm while his big, brown eyes peer into yours with pure adoration. There's a mix of worry, concern, but he knows better than this. He knows you two are better than this.

"I am too, I have been for a long time. But, please trust me when I tell you that I'm here and that I'll never leave your side no matter what. I'm here, Y/N. I want this, I want you. I have always wanted this."

"Don't lie."

"You know I hate liars." He chuckles a bit.

"I feel the same, Hwa. I do.”

"Yeah? You're with me? Genuinely?" You nod. "I need you to be sure of us, Y/N."

"I'm sure. I'm sorry I ever doubted you or questioned it, but I'm sure." You shed a few more tears while Seonghwa chuckles a bit. "Hey." You whine. "I'm serious!"

"I am, too." He smiles. "Stop crying, you look ugly when you cry." He teases and you smack his arm. "Just come here." He says, pulling you closer and lifting your chin up. "I got you, okay? I got us.”

"Okay."

"Is it okay if I kiss you?" Seonghwa asks, close to a whisper. You quietly nod, watching as he dips forward and closes in for a kiss. It's soft, it's sweet, it's light. It makes your lips tingle, it makes you feel all sorts of butterflies. Before Seonghwa can pull back, you immediately chase after his lips— asking for another, just deeper, more intense. It quickly builds without having to do or say much; Seonghwa's large hand cupping your cheeks right before you straddle his lap, careful not to break the kiss. Your tongues are fighting for dominance, background noise now also being filled with the sound of wet kisses. Small whines and whimpers. Seonghwa's hands fall to your ass, giving it a good squeeze when he feels you slowly rock against his already-hard cock.

"Fuck." He hisses just as you suck onto his bottom lip and tug back on it. "Hold onto me." He demands as he swiftly carries you, letting you wrap your arms around his neck, legs around his waist. He drops you onto the bed and continues to kiss you, making his way down to your jaw. Neck.

"Gonna ask again.” He places a kiss on your jaw. “Sure about this? Us? If you want me to stop, I'll stop." You shake your head as Seonghwa continues to plant kisses wherever he can, thumb fiddling with the hem of your shorts.

"Keep going." You reassure him through a quick cheek caress when he stops and stares. "Please. I’m sure."

"Okay." He whispers before dipping in for a final kiss on the lips. The both of you continue to shed off your clothes, tossing them at different points in your studio. "You're still on birth control, right? I'm clean."

"Mhm." You barely respond before you let out a small gasp when Seonghwa's thumb run down your folds, feeling for how wet you are already. He presses at your sensitive nub, biting onto his bottom lip when he sees how you easily respond.

"So wet already." Your mouth waters when Seonghwa finally sheds off his boxers and pumps himself a few times. When Seonghwa tugs the covers up and slightly hovers over your body, he teases you for a few minutes by running his tip up and down your folds. He lets out a small moan before slowly breaching your entrance, sliding in with ease because of how wet you are.

This whole thing feels so raw, feels so new, feels so.. meant to be.

So perfect.

Like fitting in the last piece of a 1000-piece puzzle.

Seonghwa slowly works himself into you to adjust to the feeling, his mouth slacked open against yours at how good, how perfect, you feel. He finds a steady rhythm, your legs cocked open for him as he dives deeper, and deeper— hitting you in all the right spots. Seonghwa thinks the feeling is indescribable. It's the fact that the person he genuinely loves is underneath him, the person he genuinely loves has admitted in feeling the same about him, about this. It's the fact that everything feels so, so right.

It makes everything about this exciting, more pleasurable.

"God, you feel so good—" He groans. "Baby, fuck." The pet name sends shivers down your spine, eliciting a loud moan to slip from your lips. He picks up the pace, fucking into you rougher, faster.

"Seonghwa—" You whine. He sits up, hands splayed out on your thighs to keep them spread open while thrusting into you. He watches as you shut your eyes, back arching in pleasure, teeth biting onto your bottom lip to prevent yourself from moaning too loud. "Mm'close." You mewl as Seonghwa's hips become a little sloppier, his movements rough and hard. You start to move your hips to match his movements, tipping closer and closer over the edge with every move, every moan, every kiss. Suddenly, you still as you let out a loud moan of Seonghwa's name— a huge wave of pleasure, ecstasy, washing over your body. Seonghwa takes the opportunity to chase his high, hips stuttering just as he releases his seed into you shortly afterwards. A strangled, deep moan leaves his lips as he presses wet kisses against your neck, jaw, lips.

"Y/N." He looks at you, brushing the hair away from your face.

"Hm?"

"I love you."

♡ taglist: @hwasbabygirl @fairyofhueningkai @chngbnwf @tinyteezer @everyonewooeverywhere @pearbunny @mxnsxngie @starhwahwa @woosmaid @yeosangsbbg @jycas @lyracarvahall @huachengsbestie01 @laurenwidjaja @taz-97 @asjkdk @woojirang @svintsandghosts @cheolliehugs

210 notes · View notes